October 2011

my boss fired me over email, then refused to let me collect my personal belongings

October 31, 2011

A reader writes:

My boss fired me via email at 9 p.m. on Thursday night without warning. In early October, I requested time off for two days at the end of the month to take care of personal business. He wanted to know what personal business I would be conducting and I told him it was to appear as a witness in court. I was on standby for court, and the person accused accepted a plea. I did not have to go to court, so I worked my normal hours on the first day I scheduled off, and then left three hours early on the second day I had scheduled for personal time. My boss learned that the time I spent when I left early was not for the original reason that I had requested, and fired me via email for being dishonest.

In the email, he said that I was to no longer come to his office and he would have my things delivered. I received three boxes of things, including spoiled food from the refrigerator (because it was sitting on my door step). However, he did not include many items. I also have electronic pay stubs and other personal/work related emails saved on my work email that I am unable to access.

Should I be able to pack my things at the office? If I request copies of such emails, (pay stubs, incentive schedules, saved discussions about problematic situations, the raise he gave me last week) is required to supply them? I feel like cowardly email has robbed me of any documentation I may need to get my unemployment.

Wow, your boss is an incredible jerk in multiple ways — from the belief that he’s entitled to know how you’re going to spend your time off, to the firing you for a senseless reason, to the refusal to let you return to the office to get your things, to the leaving of food on your doorstep. I’m guessing that this isn’t the first time he’s behaved like a complete ass, right?

Anyway, he’s entitled to have the company handle the packing up and delivery of your things if that’s how he wants to play it, but he’s not entitled to keep personal items of yours. So send him an itemized list of whatever items weren’t delivered, and tell him that he can either arrange their delivery in the next couple of days or you will collect them in person yourself. Be polite, but assert yourself.

Any physical property of yours absolutely must be returned to you.

However, electronic items that you were keeping on your work computer aren’t technically yours. The company owns the contents of your work computer, even personal items that you were keeping on there. You can certainly request that specific electronic items be forwarded to you, but he’s not required to do so … and almost certainly will not forward you the more sensitive ones, like “discussions about problematic situations.” Asking for those will sound like you’re contemplating using them in litigation, and since he has no incentive or requirement to give them to you, I doubt that he will. (This is why it’s a bad idea to keep your sole copies of important, personal items on a work computer.)

As for collecting unemployment, I wouldn’t worry that you won’t have sufficient documentation. In most states, unemployment eligibility is heavily weighted toward the employee, and as long as you clearly present your side of what happened, and the fact that your time off was approved in advance, you should be fine in that regard.

This guy is a jerk of epic proportions. I hope you find somewhere better soon.

{ 47 comments }

Posted in firing, jerks

how to deal with a bad interviewer

October 31, 2011

In an ideal world, all job interviews would be conducted by interviewers who are skilled at asking relevant questions and ensuring that candidates gain a solid understanding of the position, the company, and the culture. Of course, in reality, many interviewers are inexperienced, unskilled, and otherwise unable to conduct effective interviews. But if handled correctly, encountering a bad interviewer doesn’t need to derail your interview. Over at U.S. News & World Report today, I talk about some of the most common types of bad interviewers you might encounter and how you can effectively navigate each. We’ve got the no-questions interviewer, the unprepared interviewer, hostile interviewer, and more. Please check it out here.

{ 5 comments }

Posted in interviewing

short answer Sunday: 7 short answers to 7 short questions

October 30, 2011

It’s short answer Sunday. Today I get territorial about hair color and also call someone a dick. Here we go…

Friend asked me to write my own letter of recommendation

I have been looking steadily for work for a long time with discouraging results. Recently I applied for a job where a friend works (but in a different department) and had a positive initial phone interview. I mentioned this to my good friend, who I’ve known for more than a year and met while volunteering together, and asked if she might write an email to HR recommending me. She refused, and then offered for me to write my own recommendation that she would submit. I am very eager for employment, but writing my own review seems like a bad, bad idea. Am I right? I’m a little miffed at my friend for putting me in this spot!

It’s actually not that uncommon for people to ask a reference-seeker to draft an initial letter of recommendation, to make it easier/faster on them. It’s not something to be offended over. However, her initial refusal to serve as a reference at all is worrisome. You should probably find out what’s behind that — does she not feel confident recommending you? Does she generally not feel comfortable recommending friends? Find this out.

Will dying my hair red hurt my job prospects?

I’m very keen to dye my hair a henna red colour. However, I’m job searching at the moment and plan to go out and hand my resume all over town (whilst hopefully snagging some interviews!). Will this change of color hinder my chance at first impressions and ultimately, decide whether I get the job or not? I’m looking for anything in retail (excluding fashion) at an entry-level. My hair color at the moment is my natural (boring) brown, I’m in my early 20′s, live in Australia, I have several years of experience in retail and believe that hair color shouldn’t decide these things!

If it’s going to look like a color not found in nature, then yes, it may hurt your job prospects among some employers. If it’s going to look natural, then it’s fine. (Although I happen to believe that no one can or should pull off red except real redheads, and for that reason must advise you to keep your hands off my hair color.)

I don’t want to work with my friend

I recently was hired to work as a pharmacy tech, and My friend applied for the same job as mine and she had an interview and they want her to come back for a second interview, the thing is i really dont want her to work with me at all and she is not reliable and her transportation would be a problem. I never told her to apply but as soon as she found out I was hired she went and applied there, what should i do i really dont want to work with her at all and if she gets hired I will probably quit. I start training this week and i know its bad to quit but its that serious that I really cant work with her. What should I do? Should I tell my manager that I dont want her working with me and they dont know that we know each other.

In general, if your employer is considering hiring someone who you’ve worked with before and who you objectively feel will not do a good job, it’s not unreasonable to share your viewpoint with the hiring manager. But “I will quit if you hire her” and “I don’t want to work with her” aren’t going to reflect well on you; if you speak up, it needs to be from the employer’s perspective. And it needs to be objective, not based on anything personal. But I think your bigger problem is the lack of punctuation and weird capitalization issues here.

Is this company stringing me along?

I have been on 7 interviews with one particular company over the last month. The interviews have consisted of 1-on-1, video conference and telephone calls. I have met with the recruiter, hiring manager, colleagues, and the senior vice president of the department. A job offer has not been made yet. Would a company drag this process out this long without any intent of making an offer? I would assume after 3-4 interviews, they would know if I am “the one.”

No, companies don’t waste their time like this if they know you’re not the one and that they’ll never be making you an offer. It’s more likely that they don’t know that you’re “not the one” yet and they’re still trying to figure it out. Seven interviews is excessive though, and it’s reasonable to ask at this point what their timeline for making a decision is and what steps remain in the process.

Employer told me I lacked character for turning down a job offer

I was offered a job in another department and asked for the day to consider the offer. I was still unsure about it as the person I was to be working for told me he could not work with my “timeline” of one month’s notice to my current supervisor. (FYI that this is university policy.) He wanted me to give FOUR days. When he called and offered me the job, I told him that I simply could not walk out on my current department and he said well ok, he would be flexible about it. I asked for a few hours to think about it – something did not sit right with me about him. After some heavy thought, I was set to accept the position and went in to speak to my current supervisor. They countered back with an offer to match this new position’s salary. I certainly wasn’t expecting that, but because of this, I decided NOT to take the job offer. When I called to tell the other department, I was told that I had bad decision-making skills, lacked character and integrity and then he thanked me for not letting him make a mistake by hiring me. I was shocked. This is a senior administrator and I felt this was a highly inappropriate way to respond to a job applicant. Do you agree or was I out of line?

Hell no. He was clearly a dick. The one dodging a bullet was you.

Can my employer decrease my paycheck when I make a mistake?

Is it illegal for an owner of a buisness to take hours off your paycheck because you missed something while cleaning the night before?

Yep, it’s illegal. They can discipline or fire you, but they can’t dock your pay.

How can we rescind a staffing announcement?

We’ve recently offered a position to an individual who tempted here for a few months and who would have officially started as an employee today. However, her background check results are very problematic, therefore we have no choice but to rescind the job offer. How do we tell the staff who received a staffing announcement last week about welcoming this individual?

I’d protect her privacy as much as possible, saying something like, “Unfortunately, Karen won’t be able to join us as the new (TITLE) after all. We regret that it didn’t work out and we wish her the best.”

{ 42 comments }

Posted in short answers

want to ruin a friendship? hire a friend.

October 28, 2011

Right now, someone out there is thinking about hiring a friend and becoming that person’s manager. Don’t do it!

I know what you’re thinking: It’ll be awesome. You get along well, you see eye-to-eye, and it’ll be nice to have an ally at work. Plus, it’ll feel great to be able to give your friend a job!

And hey, it’s possible that you’ll be in the 1% of people who pull this off successfully. But it’s much more likely that you’ll be in the 99% of people who don’t. Interestingly, though, everyone thinks that they’ll be in that 1%.

Over at Intuit QuickBase’s blog today, I explain the problems that you’re both in for.

{ 18 comments }

Posted in hiring

when job candidates are scheduled for a half-day of interviews, can I end it early if they’re not right for the job?

October 28, 2011

A reader writes:

I’m a teacher who also manages the recruitment of new teachers at my school. We invite promising candidates to campus for half a day for a tour, classroom observations, a few interviews and a demonstration lesson. On occasion, despite our previous screening, I can determine almost immediately that the candidate is not going to be right for the position. And it usually is for one of two specific reasons: the candidate is disengaged or the candidate makes it clear that he or she has a very different philosophy from our school.

Candidates are scheduled to be at the school for several hours. I do not want to waste their time or ours, but I also do not want to make the candidate feel bad (we try to be a caring community) and I do not want the candidates to badmouth our school as a result. Should I directly address the disengagement or the lack of philosophical alignment? If so, how? And are there times when it would be appropriate to end the visit early or should I always let them go through the process since they have arranged to spend half a day with us?

I’d strongly suggest doing a one-on-one interview with these candidates before inviting them back for the full half-day schedule of activities. If you’re able to tell quickly that a candidate isn’t right, then it makes sense to do initial interviews first, and only then to invite the most promising back for follow-up interviews and a demonstration lesson.

This may seem like it’ll take you longer, but in fact, you’ll be saving yourself and your colleagues significant time (since you won’t be spending a half day with candidates who aren’t strong), and it’s also more considerate to the candidates themselves (since you won’t be asking them to go through all the work of preparing and giving a demonstration lesson before you’ve determined that they’re a strong candidate).

If for some reason it’s not possible to have them visit the school in-person more than once, then do the initial interviews over the phone. Either way, increasing your initial screening before you or the candidates make a significant time investment in each other will make your process much more efficient.

Update: The question-asker responded in the comments section below to say that she does conduct two initial phone interviews with candidates before inviting them to campus, “but no system is perfect and there are those days when someone who seemed great to at least two of us on the phone is just obviously not right once we meet them in person.” So in light of that, here’s part two of my answer:

Okay, so you’re doing initial interviews by phone. Good. And you’re right that some candidates are great on the phone but then don’t excel once you get to the in-person interview — although it’s still worth looking at what questions you’re asking during phone interviews to see if you can get more rigor in that part of that process. But it does sound like you’re committing too much time to candidates prematurely, so why not make the next step in the process a single in-person interview? No half day, no school tour, no string of interviews, and definitely no demonstration lesson at this point — just a one-on-one in-person interview with you. Those who excel can then be invited back for the final step in the process, which would be your longer string of activities.

But of course the real meat of your question is: Can you short-circuit a candidate’s interview schedule when you realize that the person isn’t right for the job? In your case, you said that the problems are almost always that the candidate is disengaged or makes it clear that she’s not philosophically aligned with the school. When it’s an issue of philosophical alignment, I think you can be straightforward. For instance: ”I’ll be candid, because I don’t want to waste your time. I think we’re on different pages philosophically. (Insert explanation of why.) Although I respect your viewpoint, we’re focused on finding teachers who are committed to ____. You’re clearly talented and you have an impressive background, but the fit here wouldn’t be right. Let’s stop here, but I’ll absolutely reach out and let you know of anything I think of that might be a better match.” And then really do that, if possible. And express gratitude for their time.

But when the issue is disengagement, that’s a lot harder to address without offending the candidate and causing bad feelings. And that brings us back to the earlier answer: Don’t schedule the lesson demonstration on the same day as everything else. Use it as the final step in your process, inviting only your finalists to do it — people who you’ve already determined through in-person meetings that you’re strongly interested in.

Of course, you want to make sure that you’re not creating a ridiculously long process, but one phone interview, in-person interviews on two separate occasions, and a final lesson presentation isn’t over the top. And the pool will be getting smaller each step of the way, because you’ll be cutting candidates as you go.

{ 30 comments }

Posted in hiring

my friend is getting married on my company’s biggest weekend

October 26, 2011

A reader writes:

I just began a new job and I love it. Unfortunately, I have a case of bad timing. One of my best friends is getting married the same weekend as the biggest event for my company, in which everyone is required to work as an all hands on deck event. In fact employees from my company are not allowed to take vacation at all in this month.

The event for my company lasts all weekend and I’m involved professionally as a head programmer. Changing my responsibilities now to attend the wedding would seem negligent, arrogant, and would get people talking about my lack of dedication, even though it is months away.

If it was a perfect world, I would want to be at both events. I love weddings and I love planning programs. My fear is that many people I know have lost friends due to not attending a wedding, and I don’t want that to happen to me. My plan is to talk to my friend and gauge her reaction, but I know she will be polite despite her true feelings. What should I do?

I should probably disclose up-front that you’re talking to someone who’s not at all a fan of the wedding hysteria that’s grown exponentially in recent years — the “it’s my special day so I get to make demands on people” attitude that many brides have (and maybe some grooms, although for some reason I never see that); the offense that some couples take if someone can’t use vacation days, travel long distances, or spend a ton of money to attend; the expectation that people will attend entire wedding weekends rather than one event lasting a few hours; and so forth. I’m really not a fan. (Although for some reason, I am a fan of TLC’s “Say Yes to the Dress” show, where brides spend thousands of dollars on wedding dresses and often throw temper tantrums in the process.)

So there’s the disclaimer about my perspective on all things wedding-related. With that out of the way, here’s my take on your situation:

You have a new job that you love. This weekend is your company’s largest event and they’ve made it clear that everyone is expected to be working. No one is allowed to take any time off that whole month because of this event. Given all that, it sounds as if attending the wedding would — at a minimum — jeopardize the way your new manager and coworkers see you. It also sounds like it’s not even a possibility — that they’d simply tell you no if you asked, and that you might look bad for even asking, given how clear they’ve made the importance of the weekend. In sum, it sounds like attending the wedding would have a significantly negative impact on your experience at this company, in this job that you love.

Now, your friend. In my opinion, a close friend who would expect you to jeopardize your professional standing or a job that you love in order to be present at her wedding — or who would hold it against you in any way that you couldn’t be — shouldn’t necessarily be a close friend. The wedding is one day. Your job is your livelihood.

There are ways that you can show support for your friend and her marriage without attending the wedding: You could throw a shower or an engagement party, help her with planning or logistics in whatever way that she’d welcome, have your friend and her husband to dinner soon after the honeymoon, send an especially thoughtful card and gift … and probably lots of other stuff too. And you can tell her very clearly how much she means to you, how much you’d love to be with her on her wedding day, and how much you regret that you can’t be.

But that’s my take on it. Ultimately this comes down to a choice that only you can make: Is attending the wedding important enough to you to jeopardize your standing at your new job? It’s certainly a perfectly legitimate choice if you decide that it is — you just need to be clear on the possible consequences.

Want to read an update to this post? The reader’s update several months later is here.

{ 103 comments }

Posted in Uncategorized

how parents can help their kids look for a job

October 26, 2011

We’ve discussed the ways in which parents inappropriately intervene in their kids’ job search here before — filling out applications for them, calling employers on their behalf, debating rejections … all wildly inappropriate and all things that hurt, rather than help, their kids.

But there are some things parents can do that will help their job-hunting kids. Over at U.S. News & World Report today, I talk about some legitimate ways for parents to be involved. Please check it out here.

{ 7 comments }

Posted in job searching

my boss keeps stealing my lunch, after I’ve asked him to stop

October 24, 2011

A reader writes:

I have a bit of a weird situation and was wondering if you had any advice on how to deal with my manager. I’ve recently been transferred to a new department, working in a new office environment, under a new manager. His diet consists mainly of fast food and take-out.

I have crazy allergies to a bunch of foods, and chemicals found in most processed foods. Some are the swell-up-like-a-balloon-and-stop-breathing kind of allergy. I make most of my food at home and bring it with me to work. I’m really open about my allergies so that people understand I’m just defective, not rude. And most people get it. Except my manager.

He eats my lunch out of the staff fridge on an almost daily basis as if the food fairy left him a gift. I resorted to packing meals that I could keep at my desk, and he started raiding my drawers when I would be in meetings or away from my desk. When I try to address the fact that he’s stealing my food, he tries to butter me up by complimenting my cooking then walks away.

Any thoughts on how I can handle this situation? Especially strategies that don’t have me going above him to complain to his manager (also, we have no HR department to turn to).

Your boss is either incredibly rude or has some kind of eating compulsion problem. Or both.

You’ve got two choices:

1. Talk to him directly. Not in passing, not off-the-cuff, but a serious, sit-down conversation that sounds something like this: “Jim, as you know, I have serious food allergies. When you eat the food that I brought to work with me, it means that I can’t eat anything that day since I can’t replace it with just anything that happens to be accessible. So when you take my food, I literally cannot eat until I go home. Like most people, I don’t do well when I’m starving. This is a medical issue for me. I need you to stop taking my food.”

If he jokes it off, repeat again, “This is a medical issue for me. If you’re going to continue taking my food, it will put me at risk of a medical problem. How can we solve this?”

If you’re like most people, you probably don’t feel 100% comfortable having this kind of stern conversation with your boss. But when you’re dealing with someone so willing to violate normal boundaries, your best bet is often a simple, direct assertion that the behavior needs to stop. I’m not going to tell you that there’s no chance of it creating tension between the two of you; it might. But you’re so clearly in the right and he’s so clearly in the wrong that it’s also likely that he’ll just feel sheepish and back off.

2. Get a locking lunchbox. Seriously. I searched online for one and couldn’t find any easily, but I did find suggestions to use a small locking toolbox or one of those lockboxes that people store money in. Get something that can only be opened with a key or a numerical combination.

But all this aside, this guy is going through your desk to steal your food, after you’ve asked him to stop. Something’s not quite right in his head.

Want to read an update to this post? The reader’s update several months later is here.

{ 189 comments }

Posted in advice about your boss, jerks

10 myths about working for nonprofits

October 24, 2011

As someone who has spent my whole career working for nonprofits, I’m used to hearing all the stereotypes and myths about the sector: nonprofits are touchy-feely places without rigor, where you can’t care about money and you’re probably a hippie, blah blah blah. There are of course nonprofits that fit this stereotype — but there are plenty that don’t, and in fact there’s a growing trend in the sector toward good management, accountability, and rigor around results.

Over at U.S. News & World Report today, I take on 10 of the biggest myths about working in nonprofits. You can check it out here.

{ 14 comments }

Posted in Uncategorized

a weekend of short answers: short answer Sunday

October 23, 2011

I think this is a first — a short answer Saturday and a short answer Sunday in the same weekend. Today, we’ve got a job offer that looks better in retrospect, a confusing rejection notice, and more. Here we go…

1. Boss is asking me constantly if I have plans to leave

I graduated from school in May (the degree doesn’t pertain to my job) and my boss has been asking me monthly if I plan on leaving soon. I’ve told her that I had no immediate plans to leave but am keeping my options open as I would like to start my new career soon. At first it was just checking in with my plans but now she’s asking me weekly and I feel like she’s trying to push me out. What can I do to make my office situation more comfortable? When does it become harassing and not “checking in with each other”?

Why not just ask her what’s going on? Say something like this: “You’ve been asking me this a lot, practically weekly. So that you don’t need to keep asking me, can we talk about what’s behind this question? I can’t tell if you’re hinting that I should be thinking about moving on, or if you’re worried that I might be. What’s going on?”

2. I turned down an offer, but now I want it

A few months ago, I interviewed for a position that I really wanted, but I refused for two reasons: 1. The salary was not what I expected and I knew they were not open to negotiations. 2. I was negotiating with another company (from a completely different field) that offered me a higher salary.

Unfortunately I have not been accepted to the other company. I know that the first company is still looking for someone, and I realize that I finally want to join their team. When I refused their position, I let them understand that I had found another position. I want to get back to them to apply for the position, but the salary issue will be the same. How should I contact them? What should I tell them? Do you think I can negotiate salary? I do not want them to think I am unstable, changing every month my mind.

If you contact them now, you should probably do it only if you’d accept the job without trying to negotiate on salary. You’re already in a weak position, because you told them that you’d taken another offer. Since it’ll be obvious now that that was a lie or that something went wrong there, you have a weak hand. You’re basically going back to them with your tail between your legs now — which you can do, but if you then turn around and try to push for more money, it’s going to look pretty silly.

3. I regret giving permission for a prospective employer to contact my current boss

I work at a university and have been in the same job for 6 years. I recently interviewed for two jobs at the same university but in different departments. When I applied for the job, the application asked if it’s ok to contact my current employer. I answered yes because I thought it would look good. Do I need to tell my boss I interviewed in case she gets a phone call from my prospective employer? I don’t want her to be blindsided, but I have not received a job offer and don’t want to tell my boss too much too soon.

Ack! Never say that it’s okay to contact your current employer, unless your boss knows you’re job-seeking and is okay with that. Normally, I’d say to contact the other jobs and tell them that you’ve realized that you’re not ready to tell your current manager that you’re looking, and ask them not to contact her. (You can say that you’d permit it at the offer stage, but not before.) However, in this case, you’re applying for jobs with your same employer, so it might be moot — usually reference-checking in that context is informal: just a call to their colleague who’s your current boss, and they’re not going to wait for your permission. So it’s a judgment call.

4. Will this error sink my chances?

I have a very sheepish question to ask. I’m in the middle of job hunting and have been applying to a couple of marketing positions. As a way of showing my diversification, I have mentioned in the closing paragraph of a couple cover letters that I have my own personal blog. I was submitting a post today and noticed a grammtical error in my last entry. I know I need to be extra careful since I want to be seen as credible, but it was something I had just simply missed. Do you think this will sink my chances with the companies I had directed toward my blog? As a side note, my cover letter and resume for the positions were error free.

No. This is miniscule. Just correct the error on your blog and be done with it.

5. Job history when past employers are out of business

How far back do you go on resumes? What do you do if all the jobs you had are no longer in business? What do you put on the online applications when there’s no address or phone number anymore? Two companies I worked for are out of business and one was bought out and moved to a different state several years ago. What would you suggest I put on online applications which want addresses, phone numbers, and emails?

I mean, you can’t make information up, so you just need to write the truth — “out of business,” “bought out,” etc. This stuff happens.

6. Jobs that require references with the application

I’m a recent grad applying for entry-level jobs. I find that a lot of the job openings in my field require that along with submitting a cover letter and resume, I also need to submit the contact info for two or more references. I haven’t been applying to jobs with the requirement to submit references at the outset because I don’t want to bother my references every single time I apply for one of these jobs. If I apply for all of the positions that I see with that requirement, it would mean letting my references know that I’ve applied for at least 7 of these positions per week. I prefer to wait until the potential employer asks for my references’ contact info because they are interested in my application, and then I only have to contact my references when I have a higher likelihood of getting hired. Should I be applying to jobs that ask for my references information at the outset, even if it means contacting my references several times a week? I don’t want to be a bother to my references. What do you think?

First of all, it’s BS that companies are requiring this at the outset, for exactly the reasons you mention. But since they are and you probably can’t even submit an application without it, submit the info and include a note that says, “Please notify me before references are contacted so that I can alert them.” (And no, don’t alert your references every time you apply for a job, since that will obviously annoy the crap out of them. Instead, wait until you’re at the reference-checking stage, which is typically post-interview.)

7. Was this rejection notice legit?

I received a phone call from an employer personnel person who said I would be contacted by her boss to set up an interview. Ten minutes before the phone call, I received a rejection email from this boss. The email referenced this boss’s email address. I am perplexed. Did the boss actually send the email or was it a computer generated email where the computer software automatically rejects within a period of time from filing the online application for not fitting the filter criteria. Should I contact the person who called me or just move on? Help me make sense of this confusion.

It could be legit (in that the first employee assumed the boss would want to interview you, but the boss decided he/she didn’t), or it could be a mistake — it’s worth contacting them and asking.

{ 32 comments }

Posted in short answers

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