my coworker obsessively checks my calendar all day long

A reader writes:

I have a coworker who recently got reprimanded for wasting excessive time during the workday. Since this happened, I can see that she has been checking my calendar multiple times a day (the email client we use provides a feature where you can see who recently viewed your calendar) to see what I have scheduled. She sometimes looks through the next 15 to 20 days on my schedule. It appears as though she is checking my calendar nearly every time I am not physically sitting at my desk.

I don’t have any extremely personal entries on there–the only things that aren’t strictly work-related are entries like “appointment” or “vacation” so my coworkers know where I am when I’m not physically in the office.

I don’t work with this person directly at the moment, so there isn’t a work-related reason she would need to know my schedule so frequently. She is not responsible for scheduling anything that I need to attend. I also sit directly across from her (we have a cubicle setup), so she would be able to simply ask me a question or walk over to me if she has a need.

Is it worth saying anything to my manager about this situation, or is it something I need to just let go? I don’t feel that there’s anything out of line on my schedule that I need to be worried about, but I can’t help but feel a little creeped out that someone who doesn’t have a supervisory capacity or even really works with me is monitoring my time so closely. I’m not sure if it’s just boredom or if she is trying to see if I’m wasting time at work.

Why not ask her about it?

There’s no reason you couldn’t say, “Hey, Jane, our calendar program is telling me that you keep viewing my calendar — is there something you needed to find time with me for?”

I’d bet that that might put a stop to it. She probably doesn’t realize that you can tell that she’s doing it, and once she does, she’ll probably cut it out.

But if not, there’s no reason you can’t ask her about it again, even more directly: “Hey, Jane, it looks like you’re viewing my calendar a lot. What do you need?”

What’s more interesting, of course, is why she’s doing it. One possibility is that she’s resentful that she got reprimanded for wasting time, and she’s looking for evidence that other people are no more busy than she is. Or, who knows, maybe she’s trying to get a sense of how other people spend their time since she’s unclear on what productive people’s schedules look like. However, neither of those would require the constant checking, and that’s the piece that potentially takes this into the realm of “obsessive grudge-nursing.”

Normally I’d say that this isn’t something to take to your manager. It’s not really a “problem” that needs to be solved — it’s just annoying behavior that isn’t really interfering with anything. But given the kind of creepiness element of the obsessiveness of what she’s doing, if she doesn’t cut it out after you mention it to her the first time, I could see saying something to your manager at that point, along the lines of “This is making me uneasy, and I felt like I should mention it to you in case it’s part of a larger pattern.”

{ 141 comments… read them below }

  1. TT

    Could it be possible that checking the calendar has become the de facto replacement for whatever she was doing that got her reprimanded in the first place? Maybe she hasn’t curled all the way over from “not engaging in a specific time wasting activity” to “finding something productive to do”. Either way I agree with Alison that she’ll probably stop as soon as she realizes someone knows she’s doing it.

    1. fposte

      I was thinking this–“I can’t go on Facebook; what’s something work-related I could look at for a minute?” And she’s probably not limiting it to the OP’s schedule but taking a run through everybody’s.

      1. Elsajeni

        Yeah, when I’m really bored at work I sometimes do things like take a tour through the office directory and see who’s put up a bio, or look through past years’ versions of the data and reports I work on — in my case if I’m doing that it’s because I’ve run out of work-safe websites to refresh, but I can see it happening if I felt like I had time to kill but didn’t dare get caught doing something obviously non-work-related, too. If I had access to see other people’s calendars, I’m sure I would work that into the Boredom Rotation as well. (Perhaps unsurprisingly, given how many advice columns I read and comment on, I am a nosy parker.) But I’d be mortified and stop if I found out that people could see when I was looking at their calendars, too.

      2. nona

        It sounds like that to me, too.

        …Just realized how much I use AAM for this. Five or ten minutes of free time -> SFW semi-anonymous chat?

        1. afiendishthingy

          Yup. Clicking around outlook starts with good intentions, checking what I need to get done when, oh yeah I need to go see this client with Wakeen, let’s look at his calendar, Mordor always has good templates for this kind of document but he’s not here, let’s look at his calendar to see if I can tell when he’ll be in. Then I realize I’ve been staring at calendars for twenty minutes.

          And I don’t look at facebook or anything like that on my work computer, but AAM is fair game for a few minutes break. Open thread days get a little dangerous though, especially if I’m working from home.

          My workload hit a lull in March and April but it’s been pretty nutty the past month, so I am doing a little better in this department… but if I don’t plan well I totally get suckered in by clicking aimlessly through calendars. More my own than others’, but I am glad people can’t see when I’ve viewed theirs.

        2. Mallory Janis Ian

          I use AAM this way, too. The regular site looks okay to people passing by, but if I’m reading one of the articles linked to another site, I copy it into a word doc so that I appear to be reading something work related. I really like that the main site looks more subtle and text-oriented and doesn’t scream “entertainment article” like some other sites do.

      3. Traveler

        Yep. I do this on occasion. When I take a break from my work, I am usually still thinking about future projects or who I need to meet with and look at calendars semi-absently. Sometimes it happens multiple times a day. It just gives me something to look at while I’m thinking. I doubt I could tell you what any of the calendars actually said.

    2. Snarkus Aurelius

      Yes and yes to both of these. op should ask around. No way hers is the only calendar getting snooped.

      1. OP

        You’re right! I checked with a coworker–the same person also makes repeated visits to her calendar every day.

    3. themmases

      That’s a good point. When I’ve been in serious procrastination mode, I’ve definitely found nominally work related stuff to do that was not productive but maybe I could convince myself it was, and it looked OK to people walking by.

      It may even start out normal: “Time to schedule a meeting with Bob… Oh, he’s in a sales meeting then? I bet that’s with Victoria, let me just check her calendar…” And it turns into 6 Degrees of Separation played by someone who just can’t get down to work.

      When I had nothing to do at a student job, I’d do that on Wikipedia. Less creepy, more fun.

    4. AE

      I would take it to the manager because she could be peeking at everybody’s calendar, which would be an even bigger waste of time. And if there’s a glitch in the program, and it’s not really happening, then the manager needs to know that too.

  2. katamia

    My guess is she’s bored and looks through people’s calendars as a way to pass the time, although even as a timepass that’s pretty excessive.

      1. katamia

        Either we didn’t have this function or I didn’t know about it when I was an admin assistant, but I could definitely see myself being that bored back then. Not sure if the coworker is in a similar kind of position and it certainly doesn’t make it okay, but I’ve definitely been that bored before.

      2. Ruffingit

        Agreed. When I need some downtime at work, I check AAM or Facebook on my phone. But then, in the past year or so, I’ve started taking a zen approach to work in that I don’t really care what other people are doing with their time. I do what I need to do and that’s that.

  3. danr

    Under the guise of proving that others are also “wasting time”, she might also be checking on all of the other calendars that she can get to, not realizing that she is creating a large waste of time. And I’m sure that she doesn’t know that she leaves a trail.

    1. Sadsack

      Oh man, she is probably going to want to just fold up inside herself and disappear when OP asks her about it. As I mentioned above, just looking into people’s calendars for the sake of doing it is basically just being nosy. How will she explain that?

      1. Ruffingit

        Yeah, no kidding. I’m sure she doesn’t realize this can be tracked. I think OP needs to ask her about it for that reason alone. She should be aware that she can be seen and that this is in fact its own time wasting activity that she could be dinged for.

    2. Katieinthemountains

      Orrrrr, every time OP leaves her desk, nosy coworker might be trying to figure out what she’s doing that’s so doggone productive. Either way, someone who doesn’t have enough to do or isn’t doing it and can’t or won’t fix that.

  4. A Bug!

    Does she think that you’re responsible for bringing her time-wasting to the attention of her manager? If she blames you for her reprimand she could be looking for evidence to take to your manager. If she’s going to get in trouble, by golly, she’s not going to be the only one?

  5. MaryMary

    OldJob’s calendaring system had a function where you could see who had looked at your calendar, with a timestamp. It was kind of a hidden function, so it wasn’t widely known that people could tell if you were looking at their calendar. We uncovered several very nosy coworkers, and a couple of creepers. A friend of mine found out a guy in finance who she’d met once was looking at her calendar a couple times a week.

    1. Future Analyst

      That’s creepy. I’m nosy, but a checking a virtual stranger’s calendar several times a week is a bit much.

  6. illini02

    This is a definite thing to just let go. There is nothing she can get that is personal. And honestly, thats kind of the good and bad that can happen when you have a system that lets everyone view your calendar. Its like when people get super mad about people checking their linkedin profile. The more attention you give it, the more something minor like this will gnaw at you. Just ignore it or even turn off the view that lets you see this information.

    I remember when Myspace first came out and you could see who was looking at your profile. People got SO paranoid. Does this guy/girl like me and wanna hook up? Are they plotting something? I was much happier without knowing this info.

    1. Ask a Manager Post author

      She’s not mad about it though (from what I can tell from the letter); she’s just finding it odd and wondering what’s up with it. Which is reasonable, because it IS odd.

      I think you tend to default very quickly to “relax!” when sometimes people’s reaction isn’t as intense as you’re reading it as — they’re just interested in a legitimately weird action someone is taking.

      1. Amanda

        And even if it were an intense reaction, telling someone to just “relax” is rarely useful.

        FWIW, I think your advice was great. It seems like something a quick conversation should take care of, and if not, I see no harm in bringing it up to the manager.

        1. Marcela

          I swear to all gods that next time my father tells me to relax, when I’m just telling him I don’t have more marmalade or something silly like that, I’m going to lose control, scream, pull my hair, cry, etc. I mean there is nothing more useless than getting a “relax”. Even when I am actually freaking out.

          1. Blurgle

            “Relax” in this kind of circumstance is far too often a code word for “you are unstable and therefore my inferior”.

            1. Hlyssande

              For me, it’s “lighten up.”

              If I wasn’t angry before, I sure as hell am now! /raaaage

        2. Katie the Fed

          I had to teach my husband very early on in our relationship that telling me to relax is like trying to smother a fire with liquid oxygen. It’s REALLY going to blow up in your face.

      2. illini02

        Thats fair. And I’m really not trying to minimize someone else’s feelings. Its just that as general advice, I tell people to not spend too much time worrying about minor things in other people’s behavior you can’t change. If I let all of my co-workers annoyances consume my time, I’d go crazy. Thats why I put in the anecdote about myspace. I just subscribe to the “Don’t sweat the small stuff” theory. While you say people’s reactions aren’t as intense as I’m reading them, it seems that if they took the time to write into an internet advice columnist, then it is bothering them a lot. And if you let minor things get to you, it can make your life more difficult. But its true that minor is a relative term, so maybe I shouldn’t phrase things that way in the future.

        1. Ask a Manager Post author

          The thing is, we talk about lots of relatively small things here — I find them fascinating and I think many other readers do too. It can be kind of deflating to be discussing something you find interesting and be told “you shouldn’t care about this”!

          1. Kc

            It appears that you are going after this commenter pretty hard! (Illini02)
            Don’t know if you meant to come on that strong, but as an outsider, yikes ..

            1. Ask a Manager Post author

              I didn’t mean it to! I’ve noticed his pattern of telling others here that they’re taking things too seriously and wondered about it.

  7. Xanthippe Lannister Voorhees

    I’d be tempted to add something really bizarre and snarky to the calendar like “make wig from your mom’s chest hair, Tuesday 12:30” and see if that gets any kind of reaction from Snoopy, but Alison’s suggestions are far more mature.

        1. Purple Dragon

          I’m laughing so hard right now – Quack indeed – and how on earth can I explain that to someone walking by ?

    1. Sabrina

      I’d put an entry that said “Private” and when you open it up the entry says something like “I know you’re reading my calendar, Jane.”

      1. AW

        If we’re going for creepy, it could say, “They’re right behind you” or “Don’t act suspicious”.

      2. M-C

        I don’t know what kind of calendar OP is using, but most of them have the option of sharing by showing ‘busy’ rather than details of anything going on. If I were the OP, I’d set that, at least for the snoop if it can be that granular, and show other coworkers how to do it too. As well as ask the snoop what she’s looking for, of course, because that’s what will really stop her..

      3. Mimi

        Or put on your calendar, “2:00pm: Confront Jane about her obsessive snooping in my calendar.” or “Speak to Jane’s boss about her obsessive snooping…” Why not have fun with nosey co-worker?

  8. Bend & Snap

    My ex from more than a decade ago checked my LinkedIn profile every three-four days for more than two years. I finally called him out on it via direct message and he stopped showing up in my alerts. But now I get “LinkedIn Member” checking my profile with the same frequency.

    It may take more than one talking to, because at this point it sounds like a habit, and it’s hard to quit cold turkey.

    1. Snarkus Aurelius

      That’s just weird because how often are you going to change your LinkedIn profile?!?! It’s not like Facebook, which he was probably also creeping, where you could post frequent updates.

    2. zora

      just block him. I have a pretty low bar for blocking someone, but especially in this situation. He’s an ex, not a coworker, and when you notice that he has looked at your profile you are spending a little bit of energy on him every time. I just blocked an ex who did the same thing, but the first time he did it. Done. Now I don’t have to deal with it ever again. It’s way easier than you having multiple conversations with him about it. Blocking is my friend.

      1. Bend & Snap

        At the time this happened, you couldn’t block people on LinkedIn. Does blocking work if they’re incognito?

        1. zora

          You technically can’t see who is looking at your page if they are doing it anonymously. But you should still be able to go straight to his profile and block him on there. Click on the arrow next to {Send a Message} and on the drop down menu is “Block or Report”

          Blocking = peace of mind. ;o)

        2. Miss M

          You can block people now. I had an experience with a person who kept looking up my profile and I notified LinkedIn about the issue. As soon as their blocking feature went into effect, their team contacted me. Also don’t make all of your LinkedIn profile public.

    3. Finn

      A guy I went out on 1 date with 20 years ago (and haven’t spoken to in all that time) checks out my LinkedIn page usually several times a month, sometimes several times in one day. Every time he does I am reminded why we never went on date 2.

      1. Bend & Snap

        That is the creepiest thing I’ve ever heard.

        I just blocked my ex thanks to zora. RECOMMEND.

      2. Career Counselorette

        I’ve had a couple of guys do this with my LinkedIn as well. One guy made pretty clear at the time he didn’t want a second date, but then proceeded to add me on literally every available social network and look repeatedly at my profiles, even years later. Maybe I was the one that got away?

        1. Finn

          The thing is, the guy isn’t stupid — I know he knows I can see this. I know in a book this behavior might be portrayed as charming or romantic somehow, but in real life it just makes the whole thing that much creepier/stalkerish.

  9. Gene

    Since I have a wide evil streak, I’d put in a Zombie Apocalypse Planning meeting fur my next meeting. Then TPS Report Editing, Departmental Font Selection, and Cubical Assignment by Meyers Briggs.

    Her snooping would have no effect on me other than offering a way to amuse myself.

    1. AnotherAnon

      I’d also add to the list of faux calendar items: “Wonder why coworker is checking my calendar obsessively” and “Talk to boss about coworker constantly monitoring my calendar.” That might get the behavior to stop without saying a word to the coworker!

      (Though in all seriousness OP shouldn’t actually do this because it’s passive-aggressive; I agree with Alison that talking to the coworker directly and matter-of-factly is the best approach.)

    2. Bend & Snap

      At my old job someone broke into a colleague’s calendar and added all kinds of random stuff going forward for MONTHS.

      March 20, get a boyfriend
      June 1, acquire more cats
      September 12, drink wine straight from the bottle because i am alone and nobody can see me

      1. MegEB

        Were they friendly with each other and this was just an office prank? Because if so, that’s actually a pretty fantastic prank.

          1. Lizzy

            Oh, thank goodness! That is definitely a funny prank between friends, but it would be pretty mean-spirited otherwise.

            1. LCL

              My boyfriend blocked my ability to write appointments directly on his calendar after I made an appointment for him to take me out to dinner. I was amused, he less so. And he took me out for dinner anyway.

              1. Zillah

                I occasionally schedule things like “Buy Zillah candy” or “Give Zillah a back massage” in my boyfriend’s calendar. I am a little bit of a child sometimes.

                (He generally finds it amusing.)

      2. Jillociraptor

        Ha. My former boss’s 10 year old added some of the greatest meetings to her calendar. Lots of reminders to buy her presents, bring home ice cream, etc.

        1. Ask a Manager Post author

          Uh oh. I still do this to my mom’s to-do list, which she keeps on her refrigerator. My additions are usually more like “transfer $1,000 to Alison’s bank account.”

    3. AW

      I’d put in a Zombie Apocalypse Planning meeting

      This has to include the lyrics to “Re: Re: Your Brains”.

  10. CaliCali

    She sits directly across from her. My theory is that she thinks OP may be one who catches her in time-wasting activities and/or was someone who finked on her, so she checks her calendar to determine when OP may be away from her desk (and therefore may not get caught dicking around on the Internet/being overly chatty with colleagues/whatever else she can do that’s an observable waste of time).

    1. Gene

      Yeah, “I wonder how long she’s going to be gone. I’ll just look at her calendar.”

    2. OP

      This makes a lot of sense–the thing that puzzles me is that she still continues the behavior that got her reprimanded (excessive talking and personal phone calls) even when I’m at my desk.

      1. CaliCali

        In this case, she may also be checking to see if you have a meeting scheduled with the people who reprimanded her!

        Disclosure: I was a former calendar stalker, BUT it was for different reasons — I had a remote boss who tended to expect instant responses from me every minute of the workday, and I’d check her calendar a lot to see if there were times when she’d be in other meetings where I knew I could do uninterrupted work, grab some coffee or lunch, etc. (or conversely, if there was a meeting she was likely to bring me in on). Fortunately 1) our system didn’t track calendar views 2) she was always telling me to check her calendar, so even if she could see it, it wouldn’t have struck her as weird.

        1. AE

          I check on my boss for the opposite reason. She doesn’t reply to my e-mails in general or not for days, but then suddenly she’ll respond right away. If I have sent what I think is an important e-mail and she hasn’t responded I’ll check to see if she’s in meetings.

      2. A Bug!

        Possibly because she believes that her reprimand was undeserved, and that she doesn’t waste any more time than anyone else who works there. She figures that if she watches you closely enough for long enough she’ll be able to support a complaint about you to even things out.

        That she hasn’t been able to catch you out yet doesn’t lead her to the reasonable conclusion that you actually are as productive as your calendar says; instead, it motivates her to watch harder because she knows you can’t possibly be as diligent as you seem to be, because if you are, then she needs to reassess what she thinks is a reasonable level of productivity.

      3. BRR

        My two guesses are she is checking to see how long you’ll be gone to know when she can waste time or she is monitoring to see if you’re wasting time. If asking doesn’t stop her, can you revoke her access?

        Why can’t she waste time on AAM like a normal person?

  11. PontoonPirate

    One of my odd tics at work is that when I’m mulling over something, I tend to dink around in Outlook a lot. It’s like doodling to me. I’ll search for random people, click around calendars I have access to, start pointless drafts that go nowhere. I’m not looking for anything; it just keeps my hands busy and some small part of my brain engaged on the periphery of work while the rest of me brainstorms. I don’t think that’s what this person is doing, but anyone who could see my Outlook activity on any given day would think I’m super weird.

    I’m probably just super weird.

    That said, I think I fall into the camp of she’s moved her time-wasting/procrastinating into a less obvious realm, including calendar stalking.

    1. Anonymosity

      I click the calendar too–and look up people in our intranet people finder. I really really hope no one can see the latter except IT (who most likely would not care). If the Person of Interest knew how many times I’d clicked on him, I’d drop dead of humiliation. (I can quit anytime I want! Really!)

      1. Rebecca

        Oh, I used to do this at OldJob a lot! I was in retail management and people were transferred around a lot. I would often click around our directory to see where various co-workers were working, who had gotten promoted, etc. I’m so glad nobody could see that, they would have (rightfully) thought I was so weird!

  12. SerfinUSA

    We call it calendar stalking at my job. A lot of my coworkers do it, mainly to see who is in meetings all day, and also to glean information from people who don’t have the security option toggled on their meetings. I know, I know, but it can be helpful to know all the staff supervisors are going on an in-house retreat to prepare new matrices for annual evaluations, and so on.

    1. Fee

      Yeah I do this a fair bit at my current job and before this post I wouldn’t really have thought it was creepy! I do it partially because we hot desk and I literally may not know where my direct team members are at any given time, but I’ll often just check calendars to see who’s meeting who, where my more awkward projects (and colleagues!) are involved. Kind of just like: “OK those two are finally due to meet today, maybe something will happen on x problem”. Neither are particularly positive reasons for doing it and there’s definitely some element of nosiness but I don’t think it’s stalking, either.

  13. tesyaa

    Somewhat related – I was in an extended slow time at work, and when I posted for an internal job I noticed that the internal recruiters left their calendars open. They’d post every interview (even ones they weren’t participating in), with attached schedules, resumes, everything! I knew who was interviewing for every job, both external and internal candidates. I never said anything to anyone, no one ever said anything to me, and after a while, I got bored with checking the recruiters’ calendars. When I checked again a year or so later, they were all hidden. It must have been a very big breach of something to leave resumes out in the open, even online, for anyone to see.

    1. KathyGeiss

      This happened to me once. My boss’ calendar was full of interviews and they weren’t marked private. I’ll cop to checking out the people (only their names were there, no resumes) but I did give her a heads up that everyone could see the appointments.

  14. Observer

    I don’t know that I would say anything to my supervisor. But, if you do decide to do that, I think framing it the way you did here makes sense – It’s not that you are afraid of what she will see, but it’s kind of weird that someone who you don’t work with and don’t report to is so obsessive about your calendar. Make sure you have some sort of reasonable answer to “what do you want me to do about it?”

    1. Wee

      I was recently underemployed. It is no fun. Perhaps her manager should find her more work to do. Could solve the whole issue.

  15. Gwen

    It sounds like she’s maybe just wasting time, but I check my coworker’s calendars a lot for…a wide variety of legitimate reasons ranging from “is there any time this week this team could get together?” to “I’m waiting for approval from Jane on this project…I haven’t seen her at her desk, is she even in this morning?” and I’d be startled if someone asked me why I was looking at their calendar so much. To see your availability, obviously? Isn’t the reason we have an integrated calendar system so that we can use it?

    1. Sadsack

      OP pretty much explained that they do not really work together and that the coworker never says anything to her about needing anything when she is at her desk.

      1. Sadsack

        Oops, meant to add…so she is at a minimum just wasting time, as you suggested. Those other valid reasons don’t seem to apply.

        1. Jillociraptor

          True, though if there are legitimate reasons, Alison’s recommended language gives the Calendar Stalkler a face-saving way to bring them up!

  16. the gold digger

    She probably doesn’t realize that you can tell that she’s doing it

    Did you know that your old boyfriends can see that you looked at their LinkedIn profiles?

    No. I didn’t, either.

  17. AW

    Is it at all possible that this is a technical hiccup/error?

    Example: if she (or the email client) is refreshing her calendar view, and therefore refreshing the view of any calendar shared with her, could that be enough for the system to think she looked at the calendar?

    1. AnotherAlison

      I often pull up close coworkers calendars with mine to schedule a meeting or see if they’re tied up for the day if I need to ask them something. Sometimes I leave the boxed checked, so any time I go to my own calendar, I am pulling up theirs, too. I don’t think Outlook is the email in question, but if it was, some people might think I’m a stalker.

      1. Meg Murry

        Yes, I was wondering if it was similar to this. I have a saved calendar view with my whole department – its possible she has something like this set up. In one calendar system I used, it was faster to type in a group distribution list to see all the calendars and then just scroll up and down to see individual availability rather than individually pick out the 5-10 people who’s calendars you actually cared about.

    2. yeah, that

      That was what I was thinking too. My combination of browser extensions and habits sometimes results in my submitting forms more than once because my browser reloads a confirmation page or something, and I’ll get messages like “Sorry, you’ve already entered the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes today.” When all I really did was save my tabs when I closed the browser, and then they all reloaded when I opened it again.

  18. Nobody

    She probably doesn’t know you can see when she looks at your calendar, so you’d actually be doing her a favor by telling her! This kind of reminds me of a time when I was an intern. There was one guy who always came up with useful things for me to do on his projects, but at one point, he went on vacation, so I didn’t have much to do. He was always conscientious about changing his voice mail greeting when he was out of the office, so I called his voice mail from my desk to find out when he’d be back. Unbeknownst to me, on that voicemail system, if you hung up without leaving a message (even if you hung up before it started recording), it would leave a voicemail like this: “Call from Jane Smith, Wednesday, June 10 at 5:15 pm. Click.” Apparently, he was checking his voicemail from home, because the next day, he called me from home and asked me what I needed. I was confused and said I didn’t call him, and he said, “Yes you did. I got a hang up voice mail from you. You know if you don’t press 3 for delete before you hang up, it leaves a message, right?” I was mortified (and wondered how many hang up voice mails I had left for other people because I didn’t know about this)!

  19. Mockingjay

    My former supervisor demanded that all our work calendars be linked and set to full view. I was also linked with my home calendar to keep up with hubby and kinder. Not a big deal, I only had dental appointments and such.

    One day, hubby and child #2 had items on the calendar. Imagine my surprise when I got an email from my supervisor. “I notice you have a lot of appointments today. Do you need to take leave?”

  20. Mena

    She may be obsessively checking other people’s calendars as well. We know she has a history of wasting time and this may be more of the same. Annoying but not so much about you specifically.

  21. Nutella Fitzgerald

    What calendar program has this feature and how will I cover my tracks if this letter is about me???

    1. Nutcase

      This was my immediate thought too! I check my annoying coworkers calendars a fair bit so that I know when I will have some peace and quiet to look forward to and plan my most complicated work around their absence. They would definitely think it odd if they saw how many times I did it!

      1. madge

        So glad I’m not the only one who has done this. It’s really the only option when someone is so loud that noise-cancelling headphones don’t work, speaking directly with the person doesn’t work (it produced more tantrums), and speaking with the boss doesn’t work. Fortunately, mine left recently (bliss, pure bliss!). I hope yours moves on soon!

  22. A Worrier

    I can say that when I get reprimanded, my mind always immidiately goes to “I’m gonna get fired” mode. I will check to see if meetings are getting scheduled that I used to be on, and am not being invited to any more. Or, if meetings are being scheduled about me. This is purely because of my own insecurities, and I wouldn’t consider it creepy as such. Also, if I’m bored I’ll look at others calendars to see if there’s something I can help out with to pass the time, or to plain just look busy when someone walks past my cube.

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