update: my boss is rude to my husband (there’s more!)

It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past.

Earlier this week I published an update from the letter-writer whose boss was rude to her husband. Now there’s more!

I wanted to add a postscript: I got another job! After I wrote to you with my update, I decided I was *just* furious enough to quit without another job offer in my pocket. To the abject horror of my parents, I did just that. I was of course very nervous about going voluntarily unemployed at the beginning of a recession, but I’m so, so pleased to report that – thanks in no small part to your job application advice – I’ve been offered another job! It’s fewer hours, more money, more benefits and (to the relief of my formerly horrified parents), much more prestige.

The offer came through on the penultimate day of my notice period, which was very sweet indeed. During that whole notice month my boss noticeably ignored me, which was an improvement. On my last day he then handed me a card with a poem (!) inside it, and said, I kid you not, “Don’t tell your hubby.” I gave what I hope was a bollock-shrivelling laugh and said of course I would tell my husband; we share everything. Boss then squeezed my shoulder and said, “I’ll miss you” in an embarrassingly heartfelt voice. Yikes.

I did, of course, show my husband the card. I then took great pleasure from deleting my former boss from my phone, thoughts and life.

{ 192 comments… read them below }

  1. Margaery Tyrell*

    can i kindly request LW share the poem if it doesn’t have any incriminating details hahaha

    1. Budgie Buddy*

      Or this could be a prompt for the commenters to engage in creative writing trying to reproduce the poem in various styles… which would also be extremely cathartic.

      I originally read “don’t tell your hubby” as being the final line of the poem and now I feel cheated because I was wondering what he rhymed “hubby” with.

      Guess I made a big flubby :(
      Don’t tell your hubby ;)

        1. Mrs. Hawiggins*

          People want to know why I just screamed in my office. I saw a mouse was all I could say. I’m dead.

        1. Escapee from Corporate Management*

          I know it doesn’t include your last line, but I couldn’t resist. I also meant to say hubby, not husband (darn autocorrect).

      1. MEH Squared*

        Roses are red,
        It’s quiet in your cubby.
        My love for you is not dead;
        Shhhhh, don’t tell your hubby!

      2. BluRae*

        I have written
        a poem
        for you on
        your final day

        on which
        you were probably
        hoping
        to leave without incident

        Forgive me
        I’ll miss you
        so much
        and don’t tell your hubby

      3. Elsewhere1010*

        Being around you gives me a chubby

        So whatever you, please don’t tell your hubby.

        ~ William Wordsworth, 1835, from the collection Leaving the Office at Sunset

      4. Vio*

        I had a meeting with HR
        They told me I have been a jerk
        That I should never make a move
        On someone with whom I work
        But now you are moving on
        I will of course miss you
        But since we don’t work together
        Does that mean I can kiss you?

      5. Allegra*

        my name is Boss,
        and its not rite
        to hit on u,
        and yet despite –
        on ur last day
        to send u home
        with one last creep,
        i rite dis poem.

        1. Dark Macadamia*

          my nam is boss
          and when u leav
          u kno I’ll cry
          u kno I’ll grieve

          I hope that u
          don’t think me grubby
          I lov you so
          don’t tell ur hubby

      6. tinyhipsterboy*

        there once was a boss from Nantucket
        who got a crush on his employee and said “well, fuck it”
        he said “let’s go ‘hide’ in the cubby,
        don’t tell your hubby”
        so she told him off badly and decided to quit!

        It’s more of a poem about the situation, but hey.

        1. Greg*

          OMG I totally didn’t see this until after I posted mine below. Great minds! You win bonus points for using the boss’ actual words

      7. Greg*

        There once was a boss from Nantucket
        Who wanted his employee to cuck it
        He thought he was smooth
        With his passive-aggressive moves
        But she told him, “Take this job and shove it!”

    2. TomatoSoup*

      I hope it was an attempt as at dirty limerick. I just finished my second final exam for the day and could use a pick me up.

    3. Goldenrod*

      PLEASE that’s what I came here to say – I must hear that poem!

      Also: “I gave what I hope was a bollock-shriveling laugh.” LOL

    4. trilusion*

      @Alison, would you maybe compile an update to this update, containing all the poems from the commenters?

      I haven’t laughed this much in a while. Thank you creative geniuses!

    5. Danielle*

      We really need AAM branded t-shirts with “Don’t tell your hubby” on the back and, like, “weak ass rolls” or something on the front.*

      *”I will confront you by Wednesday of this week” also a contender.

  2. Dr. Rebecca*

    eyurrrrghh, no, the poem and shoulder squeeze!!

    Good for you, LW, for getting out of there and into an improved situation.

    1. MigraineMonth*

      OP, if there’s a functional whisper network at your former workplace, consider sending it information about former-boss’s creepiness. It is *of course* not an obligation, but that guy deserves to be treated like a social pariah.

      1. NephQThorne*

        Actually, I’m gonna go a step further here and say do the above, and if it hasn’t been too long, maybe put in a word at HR if you think that will do anything. This guy’s clearly abusing his managerial position, and if he’s as desperate as he’s coming off in your letters (and I suspect he is), it’s pretty likely he’s gonna do this to someone else.

  3. WantonSeedStitch*

    Oh my goodness. What a great outcome, and hooray for getting out of such a cringey situation! Now I want to see this poem.

  4. Observer*

    Oh my! You’d think the idiot would have enough self-respect to maintain his dignity.

    Well, at least you have ironclad confirmation that your decision to resign was right and reasonable risk to have taken, even if the new job had not come through.

  5. Season of Joy (TM)*

    Oh man. I would love to know how he will remember you in the story of his life. Probably “the one who would have been, if only she hadn’t met her husband before me.”

    1. Analytical Tree Hugger*

      Coincidentally, I’ve been browsing LGBTQ+ movies lately and found several with a similar premise of “missed connections.”

      I’m developing a sense that, if a situation or feeling could be written as a compelling narrative for a film or soap opera, then I should extricate myself from that situation post-haste…

      1. NephQThorne*

        my personal litmus test for this kinda stuff is if at any point I think to myself “…Is this a bit?”, I bounce.

      2. SarahKay*

        Ha, a couple of years ago I realised I should observe my life as I do my favourite soap opera, and if I would be saying “No! What are you doing?!?” to a character making my decisions then I should make a different decision. It’s been surprisingly helpful at cutting through my internal justifications of why I want to make the potentially bad choice.

      3. TinySoprano*

        Literally the plot of Werther by Massenet. Guy meets girl, falls hard, finds out he’s too late and she’s engaged to someone else, he sings a lot of sad songs about it and then it becomes one of those rare operas where the guy dies at the end instead of the girl.

        1. Esprit de l'escalier*

          But before Werther kills himself, he gets her to admit she loves him too (but she won’t abandon her fiance for him), thereby probably guaranteeing that she will feel both guilty about his suicide and unhappy in her marriage either forever or for a good long time. I always thought that was pretty selfish and scuzzy of him.

          However, if Werther had left her a poem, it would have been a great one.

  6. Empress Matilda*

    Yay, OP! Everything about this letter is perfect, and I’m glad you’re away from that Creepy McCreeperson. Enjoy your new job!

  7. I Am On Email*

    Thank you for the update to the update! It was even more glorious than I’d hoped it would be.

  8. Ragged and Rusty*

    “I’ll miss you”
    And that will remain in my nightmares, thanks.

    Ew ew ew ew I am so glad you got a new job and you’re free and again, old boss is ew.

  9. ZSD*

    Do we know if the boss wrote the poem, or if he gave the OP a copy of, like, “My Last Duchess” or something?

    Also, ick, ick, ick. The boss’s behavior might be excusable in a seventh grader – “Don’t tell your boyfriend, but here’s a poem for you” – but not in an adult.

  10. ENFP in Texas*

    If there is anything in the card that crosses a line, I hope the OP will share it with HR so he doesn’t do it again. The fact that his actions impacted her career path should be worthy of reprimand, and if the “don’t tell your hubby” card included anything that would be considered harassment, HR needs to know.

    1. Ellis Bell*

      If there is anything *in* the poem that crosses a line?! Actually…. Yes, I suppose it could be even worse than this.

    2. Observer*

      Eh, I think that if the OP has the headspace for it, they could let HR know regardless. Especially if they still have the card…

    3. sometimeswhy*

      I’d say that the “don’t tell your hubby” crosses the line. If the OP has the oomph or [eff]s for one more quiet volley, sending a message to former-employer’s HR with a scan of the farewell message might be useful if it’s a pattern of just-at-but-not-across-the-line behavior. I’d include a note that, while he didn’t seem to cross a line in any actionable way while the OP was actively employed there, Boss was rude to her spouse, routinely scheduled them for late/closing shifts without a third person present which made her uncomfortable, and gave her this poem (scanned and attached) upon her departure.

    4. DJ Abbott*

      The thing that bothers me most about this situation is the boss scheduling himself and OP to work alone, especially since it’s against the rules. I’m glad OP quit before allowing that to happen.
      OP is lucky she was in a position to quit. If she feels up to it at all, let HR know all the details because this will probably happen again and the next person might not be able to quit.

  11. JaneLoe*

    My simple response to this update is:

    YAAAASSSSSS!

    So happy you got yourself out of that unhealthy situation. I have so many thoughts about the boss but let’s just leave it at: May god rest peace on his soul.

  12. Zorak*

    Good for you! And lol at your retort to him, that’s awesome.

    I would definitely recommend mentioning in your glassdoor review that the boss is OK creeping on female employees though. it might help someone else not have to go through that whole process and the whole “Is he or isn’t he creeping on me” exhausting carousel.

  13. learnedthehardway*

    Honestly, the man should be ashamed of himself.

    Any chance you can provide the card to HR and explain that you are leaving because the manager’s behaviour? Would serve him right, if you did.

  14. els*

    That second paragraph, though. Wow.

    I would have loved to see his expression after the laugh, but the squeeze? The “I’ll miss you” and “don’t tell your” [[shudder]] “hubby” of it all? Pardon me while I barf out my entire skeleton.

    1. goddessoftransitory*

      I have transformed myself into a slime mold and am running my mass through a sieve to rid it of the memory of that bit.

  15. Gerry Keay*

    Honestly? I hate a shoulder squeeze so much, makes my skin crawl just thinking about it. I think it’s because it so often feels like the zone of plausible deniability for creepy men, so it feels intentionally boundary-crossing AND like they’re trying to get away with something. (I know I’m massively projecting here and this is almost certainly a me-issue but ugh I just wish people would stop doing it, especially at work.)

    1. pope suburban*

      Yes. I don’t know that, having already quit, I’d be able to resist the impulse to swat the hand away. Which, quite frankly, is always an acceptable response to unwanted/unsolicited touching, and it depresses me that work culture is currently such that a reasonable deflection of a hand could be grounds for all kinds of future hardship. Like…even if you’re a touchy person who means no ill by it, check in with people before you touch their person! It’s not hard! It’s not strange! Please be polite!

      1. Anon_for_this*

        I did this involuntarily at a long-ago job. One of the witnesses got the perpetrator’s ass in a sling with management.

      2. SpringIsForPlanting!*

        Yes. I used to travel frequently, alone, as a women. I developed certain reflexes. They’re mostly rusty now but people who grabbed me unexpectedly used to get an elbow to the chest. I didn’t always mean to but jeez. Don’t grab people.

        1. Ally McBeal*

          When I was in high school, a girl liked to put me in headlocks for laughs – she was tall and broad, I’ve been 5’0″ since 8th grade. My deepest fear is dying by lack of oxygen – drowning, strangulation, etc. – plus my mother used to grab me by the back of my neck when she wanted to move me in a particular direction and I absolutely hated it, so I don’t let ANYONE touch my neck with their hands. I ended up biting her arm once and it took care of the problem.

          I was mortified, many years later, when a work colleague stuck his arm in front of my neck as I was trying to walk past him – he could’ve clotheslined me – and I bit him out of reflex. Not hard, I didn’t even leave a mark, but I did leave an impression… and once again, it took care of the problem. I don’t get why people can’t just keep their hands to themselves.

          1. Observer*

            I was mortified, many years later, when a work colleague stuck his arm in front of my neck as I was trying to walk past him – he could’ve clotheslined me – and I bit him out of reflex.

            The person who should be mortified was that idiot. I don’t think I would have reacted this way – but I actually think that your reaction was quite appropriate.

            1. Observer*

              Let me edit that. Biting is generally NOT an appropriate response to even misbehavior in the office. And I think that to deliberately do it, even when provoked in this particular manner.

              But this idiot created a situation where someone was almost forced to react without thinking, and in a way that invites a very negative response.

              That’s why I think that IN THIS PARTICULAR CASE *ONLY* you have nothing to be mortified. But also, no, it’s not a normal thing to do in the workplace. If it does get normalized, it’s time to get out.

      3. Mrs. Hawiggins*

        I used to have VERY long hair which drew people’s curiosity tenfold to me. A new employee, also new to the U.S. where we have (or try to have) a policy on unwanted touching came up from behind and literally ran her hands through it, pulling it slightly. I screamed like I was at the bottom of a well, it scared me so bad. She apologized profusely, and people came out of the woodwork, including the HR director who immediately asked to speak to her. I cut it shorter, not because of people – I was going to anyway…but geez that still stops my heart when I think about it. Scared me to death.

        1. Enda Meringue*

          One thing I regret about having a tattoo at the top of my back, near my neck, is that occasionally it has caused people to lean in or BRUSH MY HAIR AWAY to see it and nothing freaks me out more. Admittedly, the one person to full on grab and move my ponytail to see the tattoo better was about 10 years old, so my response was pretty gentle—but I did once completely automatically throw up my hands and swing around, smacking a man who was giving me an unsolicited shoulder rub hard in the face, so the kid was lucky my brain kicked in before that happened.

    2. Season of Joy (TM)*

      I was the recipient of an unexpected shoulder squeeze from a professional acquaintance at a conference a couple weeks ago. They followed up with a message encouraging me to apply for some new positions they’ll have open in the next month or two. I shan’t be applying.

      1. Former Employee*

        It’s apparently past my bedtime because I read it as they followed up with a massage.

        Yikes!

    3. Kimmy Schmidt*

      I don’t think it’s just you. This is exactly my read on the shoulder squeeze and the “I can only possibly squeeze by you if I touch your lower back”.

      1. Sidler*

        I am definitely guilty of the unintentional lower back touch, but usually in public, not at work. Like when a store has a giant display taking up half the aisle and someone is standing in such a way that I can barely squeeze past. I put my hand at lower back height, say “Excuse me, but don’t back up.” and slip past. The hand is purely to keep from having additional contact if they DO back up.
        Also, stores, you know you are obscenely busy right now. Stop clogging up your aisles with displays!

        1. Ismonie*

          If someone did that to me I might hit them reflexively. I think in many places if you have to touch a person the upper arm is better. I just say “pardon me, can I get by” and keep my hands to myself.

        2. Cate*

          Yeah, that’s not great. I hate it. Everyone hates it. You’re not an exception to this and please stop. You can say excuse me or sorry or just wait.

          1. D*

            I would rather get backed into by someone on accident and have their whole body run into me than someone do the lower back thing on purpose.

    4. MEH Squared*

      It’s not a you-thing (or if it is, it’s a me-thing, too). It’s exactly what you said–juuuuuuuust enough plausible deniability for the person doing it to make it hard to speak up. Not impossible, mind you, but hard.

    5. Slow Gin Lizz*

      I have been on the receiving end of shoulder squeezes and other unwanted attention from males with more power than me and it always makes my skin crawl, so yeah, I’m with you on that. When I was a teenager I was the first chair violinist (concertmaster) in a small student orchestra and the conductor KISSED MY HAND at the end of one of our performances. For context, it is tradition for a conductor to shake the hand of the concertmaster at the end of an orchestra concert so I was expecting that but it was so GROSS that because I was a girl he kissed my hand instead. I visibly flinched onstage and my family made fun of me for it. I’m so grateful that that guy was only our conductor for that one concert.

      In my adult life I had to tell a coworker that I’d gone on one date with to STOP touching me after that. I did it in proximity to other coworkers so I had witnesses but I told him I’d report him if he continued to do it. Naturally he did the defensive negging thing that so many guys do when called out on their appalling behavior but at least the interaction had the effect I wanted.

      My point? Being touched when you don’t want to be is exceedingly creepy, so I feel OP and you on this.

    6. goddessoftransitory*

      I just watched an episode of Sister Boniface where a slimy character has the habit of patting people on the back when it’s clear they’re not into it, and in the last scene he’s fired and they all take great pleasure in patting him on the back as he storms out.

    7. Observer*

      (I know I’m massively projecting here and this is almost certainly a me-issue but ugh I just wish people would stop doing it, especially at work

      Given the context, I actually do NOT think you are projecting at all. To me, this *proves* that everyone who told the OP that Boss is trying to creep on her was 100% correct.

  16. Bill, the Bond Company Stooge*

    Congrats on getting out of there!

    A card with a poem in it? “Don’t tell hubby”???? Ewwwwwwww.
    I feel like I need a shower.

  17. Mangled Metaphor*

    “Roses are red
    Green is a pea
    I don’t like your husband
    You should be with me”

    You needed a new job
    And now you have one!
    Thanks for the update
    OP you have won

    (I apologise, but have no regrets)

  18. Hen in a Windstorm*

    Oh my god, everyone was right. So disgusting! I’m so glad you got a better job, OP. And I am enjoying imagining your Truly Terrible Laugh (TM), hearty, loud, a bit of pity and condescension in it.

  19. Danish*

    the audacity of this man. Don’t tell your hubby! Please.

    Congrats on the new and better-in-all-ways job, LW!

  20. Port*

    Congrats LW!

    I definitely am in favor of sharing the poem or reading fanfic poems from the commentariat. But have you also considered giving the *written on actual paper* poem to HR and making a report? This is pretty damning.

  21. Ellis Bell*

    Urrrggghh I hate being right about this stuff. It would be nice if there was only one or two crushes in the world that made people into husband haters, but it’s weirdly common (and indicative of leaning towards an ownership attitude towards women). It’s so odd though.

  22. Amber Rose*

    May I propose part of this poem in response, courtesy of the brilliant Brian Bilston:

    An Update to My Privacy Policy

    I have updated my Privacy Policy
    as part of my ongoing commitment
    to not being found,

    using simple-to-understand language,
    such as “please go away”
    and “just leave me alone”.

  23. Just Like Heaven*

    Is it?

    Happy Christmas, I wrapped it up and sent it
    With a note saying “I love you”, I meant it
    Now I know what a fool I’ve been
    But if you kissed me now, I know you’d fool me again

    (Note this doesn’t count against Whamageddon rules)

    1. Not Tom, Just Petty*

      Freaking Casey Kasem got me on like Dec 1. Ghost of Christmas Past was supposed to be NICE! I was flipping stations, one was replaying an old top 40 broadcast. “Next up Wham!” OK, Casey, wake me up before I go, go, drifted into thinking about that song…suddenly, I got Whammed for christmas. :(

      1. Season of Joy (TM)*

        Mainly the “6h work day, our salaries are 20% higher than the market and we have 7 paid vacation weeks a year”

  24. MEH Squared*

    OP, I’m really glad you’re out of there and well rid of your creepy ex-boss.Here’s to a much better and brighter 2023!

  25. Ellis Bell*

    I claimed you weren’t my type
    To get you alone after work
    But you ignored my hype
    And kept talking about that jerk.
    I told you I’d get you a win
    And wanted you to buy my farce,
    But if you bring your husband in,
    I will totally show my arse.

  26. Crazy Book Lady*

    You’re leaving this job;
    It made me quite sad.
    But thinking it over,
    My heart feels so glad,
    Now we’re not colleagues,
    HR has no say.
    So meet me for dinner,
    Just tell me the day.
    P.S. Don’t tell hubby.

  27. redflagday701*

    This man really just had a Hugely Meaningful Moment™ in his life when he said goodbye to you, and cannot comprehend that it was a purely subjective experience.

    1. cncx*

      He really thought he was having a moment! I want to laugh but it’s so creepy, ugh.

      While my stbex boss isn’t a creepy creep, I felt just like OP about deleting his number lol, it was extremely cathartic

  28. Mad Harry Crewe*

    My rolle is boss
    I have a plan
    at drinks tonite
    I shun yor man
    I blok career
    give poor revue
    With shoulder squeeze
    say “I’ll miss you”

    1. Kit*

      Ah, we had a This Is Just To Say upthread, as well as limericks and haiku, so with a bredlik, all the poetic forms have been observed!

        1. MeepMeep123*

          I’ve loved you oh-so-deeply, from afar
          I’ve wanted you from head to pretty toes
          And every time I work with you, my star,
          I want to kiss your tender little nose.
          The sight of you at work – it makes me swoon;
          I want to watch you stacking books all day.
          Your face is just as lovely as the moon;
          And I don’t care what my co-workers say.
          The only obstacle to our co-working bliss
          Is that you have a husband, oh my dear.
          That thought makes me so mad that I get blubby.
          Because of him, I can’t give you a kiss.
          I wish I could give him a cauliflower ear.
          I love you and I hate him! (Don’t tell hubby.)

          1. MeepMeep123*

            Sigh, the next to last line doesn’t scan. How about “The thought of him fills me with hate and fear” instead?

            1. 1LFTW*

              “I wish I could throw him out on his ear”?

              Regardless, I stand in tremendous awe of anyone who can casually throw a sonnet together, and I am applauding wildly inside my heart.

  29. KatEnigma*

    By “delete,’ I hope OP meant “blocked on every available platform.”

    I ran into a former boss at a club once when I was in my late 20’s who upped his harassment when he thought it was then safe from work consequences.

  30. Dust Bunny*

    ” . . . bollock-shriveling laugh . . . ”

    This is the second time today I’ve laugh-choked on food.

  31. BasketcaseNZ*

    Oh man, that farewell reminds me of when my favourite boss ever left the company I was then working for, and our next up the chain openly leered at her and said “well, now the ‘Don’t screw the crew’ rule doesn’t apply”… (insert wink, wink, nudge, nudge here).
    I avoided that dude for the (thankfully short) rest of my time there.

    1. Observer*

      He actually SAID those words out loud? In the office?

      And he really thought that it would land positively!?

  32. MurpMaureep*

    First I am so very happy for you OP, this is terrific news. Second, good for you for deciding you could no longer put up with this man’s nonsense.
    But truly do consider reaching out to HR and describing his behavior towards you (and your husband) over the course of your employment there. Even if none of it is considered actionable harassment, it could be used in future cases where he crosses lines with other women. It also helps make future complaints more credible.
    There is absolutely no legitimate reason for a supervisor to tell their employee not to tell their spouse about a goodbye card. That alone should put him on HR’s radar.

  33. Dawn*

    I am thrilled to have this unimpeachable proof that the commentariat was quite correct about what was going on.

  34. Michelle Smith*

    I knew this guy was creeping. Ugh. I’m so, so happy you got out of there!!! Way to go OP!!!

  35. Katiekins*

    I’ll miss you like the devil
    Just all Beelzebubby
    I know you’re on the level but
    Don’t tell your hubby

  36. anoncat*

    Lmaooooo what an update, love this OP. That card so clearly confirms what I suspected from your first letter, that he told you he likes done-up alt girls because he thought you’d want to know what he’d like to see. What a doofus weirdo.

  37. I try to be an innocent bystander*

    There once was a boss from Nantucket
    Caused the OP to quit and say: “F&*k it!”
    The gross shoulder squeeze
    And his poetic sleaze
    Made her search for a big vomit bucket

  38. Walk on the Left Side*

    Never doubt that I’m a total creeper
    Regardless of how much I raise your pay
    Don’t tell your hubby — I swear he’s not a keeper

    The cost of mentorship could not be steeper
    With bitter spousal insults hurled each day
    Never doubt that I’m a total creeper

    Crafting words to paint him ever cheaper
    He couldn’t be as great as they all say
    Don’t tell your hubby — I swear he’s not a keeper

    Pout, dismiss, disparage him that *bleep*er
    My lust grows strong; it’s time for you to pray
    Never doubt that I’m a total creeper

    You think your love for him could not be deeper
    A night (of work) work alone with me, but hey
    Don’t tell your hubby — I swear he’s not a keeper

    Appraisal like a scythe and I the reaper
    A shoulder squeeze to send you on your way
    Never doubt that I’m a total creeper
    Don’t tell your hubby — I swear he’s not a keeper

  39. Kaye*

    Letter Writer’s boss
    Proved himself to be not much loss:
    His behaviour had already been distinctly grubby
    When he asked her not to tell her hubby.

  40. Bunny Lake Is Found*

    What’s really alarming to me here is this: OP was married and clearly demonstrated that she was happy in and committed to her relationship (hubs attended work events, OP defended him etc.) and yet Boss STILL arranged for the “one-on-one” work time and pulled all this cringetasticness when OP left. I cannot fathom how much worse this will be for the next subordinate Boss develops a crush on who maybe is just dating their partner or single. Because I have to imagine in Boss’s mind the only reason he couldn’t win over OP was because she was already married and there was no chance that were she single she STILL would not wanted to date him.

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