how long should you wait if someone is late to a virtual meeting? by Alison Green on January 12, 2022 A reader writes: How long do you need to wait if someone is late to a virtual meeting? I’m not really talking about big group meetings because it’s not too likely that *everyone* will be late, but if you’re booked with one or two others, and in a situation with no or minimal power differential to factor in, when can you reasonably log out and send an email? Five minutes? Ten? Does it change inside or outside your organization? I wouldn’t just ghost someone who’s late for a meeting, but there’s only so long I’m willing to sit on Teams/Zoom/whatever waiting for someone else to show up. I’d give it 10 minutes and then disconnect and send a message saying something like, “I’m guessing you had a conflict come up with our 2 pm call. Let me know when we can reschedule for.” Or sometimes it makes sense to say, “I’ll be available until 2:20 if you get this but otherwise let’s reschedule.” That assumes relatively equal power on both sides. If it’s your boss or a client, I’d give it a little longer (but not more than 15 minutes, unless there’s a specific reason to handle it differently — like if they mentioned they might be late and asked you to wait). If it’s a big VIP, I might hang around even longer, especially if it’s someone outside your organization and you need to talk to them a lot more than they need to talk to you. On the flip side of that, if you’re doing someone a favor by carving out time for them at all (like an informational interview or a vendor who wants you to buy something you’re not yet sold on), I wouldn’t wait more than five minutes before dropping off. In all these situations, ideally you’d have something you can work on while you wait so that you’re not just wasting that time … although sometimes it’s hard to do that, if you need to keep your focus on staying prepped for the meeting that you’re still hoping is about to start. You may also like:my coworkers are annoyed when I'm 2-3 minutes late to meetingsour Zoom meetings are a disorganized messhow do I interrupt my boss in person when I need something? { 167 comments }
Richard Hershberger* January 12, 2022 at 2:03 pm Back in college, fifteen minutes was the standard for class being canceled if the prof didn’t show up. This was, so far as I known, completely informal, but seemed to be generally accepted, including by the professors.
After 33 years ...* January 12, 2022 at 2:22 pm In our university, it’s 10 minutes across the board, including remote consultation / question sessions. Part of this is linked to the regional differences mentioned by HCW below; part of it is scheduling multiple time commitments; part is mutual courtesy with respect to set appointments; part is one’s general attitude towards time (highly variable amongst people!). However, I’m notorious for starting on time, regardless of who might not be there, even if they are higher in the hierarchy.
Dole* January 12, 2022 at 4:26 pm I’ve taught full time at two universities and have never found that to be a thing. Undergrads assume everyone is a professor, don’t read the syllabus for credentials, and don’t care what you are. It’s 15.
Wisteria* January 12, 2022 at 5:53 pm I have taught part time at 2 universities and attended 4 full time, and everyone I have ever gone to school with knew that joke, and knew it was a joke. My experience with the rest of your statement is also quite different.
Dole* January 12, 2022 at 7:55 pm Must be either a discipline thing, a regional thing, or a generational thing. I’m tenured with a PhD and all of us at the regional teaching conference kvetch about it each year. Grad students care. Undergrads are oblivious.
licorice* January 13, 2022 at 1:25 am I taught undergrads when I was in graduate school and the undergrads in my department definitely noticed. They didn’t treat me poorly or anything (quite the contrary!) but they knew I was a grad student.
Drago Cucina* January 12, 2022 at 5:42 pm When I was in the Army it was similar. Company grade officers and NCOs: 10 minutes Field grade officers and senior NCOs: 15 minutes Flag officers: You’re stuck, you wait
Aggretsuko* January 12, 2022 at 2:57 pm That’s always the rumor, but literally no professor was ever that late. Even the flakiest one would show up before then.
Snowball* January 12, 2022 at 2:59 pm I had a professor who frequently no showed or emailed last minute to cancel class – unfortunately when we complained there was little the department could do because she had tenure.
PT* January 12, 2022 at 3:11 pm I had a professor who would email last minute to cancel class. In 2003. Before there were smartphones and before the campus had wifi. So any students who had been in their dorm rooms or in a computer lab would know that class was canceled: anyone who’d been in class or work or at lunch or had already left by then would show up to find an empty lecture hall and a bunch of other students standing around like ?????. Rumor was Professor canceled class when it was raining, if he had a classroom in a different building from his office, because he didn’t like walking in the rain.
Snowball* January 12, 2022 at 3:48 pm Mine was 2006ish – smartphones may have existed but not many had them I remember my routine being that I go to a 9 am class and then there were computers in the room the frequently canceled class was in with no class before it so I would check my email upon arrival and either go home or wait it out. I somewhat recall that at least some of the absences were due to personal issues but I also don’t think the professor looped in the department/school with what was going on. I don’t really know how subs are supposed to work in college! Ultimately I never really learned the material and somehow scraped by with a C
JustaTech* January 13, 2022 at 4:38 pm I had a professor for one class who spent most of a Wednesday class (MWF class) berating a large portion of the class for consistently failing to show up on Mondays and Fridays. (“Except you all, but you know I’m not talking to you” where “you” were the folks from the science school and the non-traditional students and their kids.) He made some really good points about respect, and also that every class cost $70/class (not a calculation most of us had done) and we wouldn’t blow off a concert so why were we blowing off class? Cue the next class, which he canceled for a “bad vibes day”.
Lady_Lessa* January 12, 2022 at 3:52 pm We had a chemistry prof who was about an hour late for the general chemistry final. (Not my section) and her final worth 500 pts. was 10 multiple choice questions. She even used the same test for both sections of general chemistry. Sigh, I gave a struggling friend all the details, since the tests were several days apart, and even then he didn’t do well. She did not come back the next year.
Dole* January 12, 2022 at 4:29 pm My coworker stopped showing up to work during week 4 and no one realized and no students complained. The Registrar blew the whistle when grades weren’t submitted.
Environmental Compliance* January 12, 2022 at 6:10 pm When I was TAing first year chem at a large uni, one of the other section’s TA (in my same lecture) just….stopped showing up to anything but a lab. Their students didn’t say anything until the final exam. The rest of us got to scramble to try to do catch-up sessions for their students and then had to grade that entire section differently because they did not get the same chance to learn as the rest. Otherwise they would have all completely failed the class. We also all had to scramble to grade all of the lab reports submitted during that time and never graded or entered into the system. I have no earthly idea why *none* of those 50 students said anything to anyone for so long. This covered about half a semester. I think the first we heard of it was about 2 weeks to the final when one of their friends in another section said something to their TA. I however had a couple students complain to the professor that I took 18 hours to grade a lab report when the standard was 48 hours and 10 of those hours were commuting/sleeping and another 4 were classes – both my own and the one I taught, with those students in it.
No Longer Looking* January 13, 2022 at 2:52 pm I mean, they should have all received an Incomplete with free option to re-take, I should think. Regardless of how well they did with what they had, they shouldn’t get credit for knowing a subject matter they haven’t been taught.
KoiFeeder* January 12, 2022 at 10:04 pm Yeah, that happened to me in undergrad with one of my classes. We did try to complain, but the dean and the registrar kept pushing us off on the other and I don’t think they ever took us seriously.
Nope* January 12, 2022 at 8:36 pm It happened to me a few times in college (graduated with the last 5 years)
licorice* January 13, 2022 at 1:26 am Oh, I had a professor who was routinely that late, and occasionally was 20-30 minutes late. Then she would breeze in and start teaching like nothing ever happened, and be affronted if half the class left.
tamarack & fireweed* January 12, 2022 at 3:30 pm I hope that rule tops out at one point for 4h lab classes…
Delta Delta* January 12, 2022 at 3:15 pm I’m an adjunct instructor at a law school and I always warn my students up front that there might be times I’m late due to a court hearing going long. Only once was I more than 15 minutes late, and I emailed the class ahead of time. They were cool with that because they knew that I was late and why.
OtterB* January 12, 2022 at 3:38 pm My mother, who went to college 80 years ago, had a story about a professor at her school who was sufficiently late by the defined criteria that the students left. At the next class meeting, he said, “My hat was on the table. You should have known I was in the building and waited.” At the next meeting, of course, the professor came in to find a hat on every desk in the room and no students. :-)
Software Dev* January 12, 2022 at 6:01 pm Love this story and the idea that a hat has its own gravitational pull that prevents anyone from moving too far from it.
Phony Genius* January 12, 2022 at 4:07 pm I had a professor who gave a 2-hour test and had a grad student proctor administer it. Except the proctor was 90 minutes late, and the professor, thinking that the student proctor had it covered, was nowhere to be found. Unfortunately, this professor had the attitude of “the scheduled time of the test is the only time you are allowed to take it” and “a grad student is still a student, so he’s one of your peers. If you have a problem with something he did, take it up with him.” The grading curve ended up really weird (nobody failed to my knowledge), and I never saw that grad student again.
Salad Daisy* January 12, 2022 at 4:28 pm Brings back memories! Also, if you liked the prof you would give them more slack.
Polyhymnia O'Keefe* January 12, 2022 at 8:00 pm When I was in junior high, we had a period where a teacher didn’t show up — it was the week of a school trip, teachers were covering for each other, and the one who was supposed to cover our class forgot or something came up. Let me tell you, that class of 14-year-olds was the best-behaved we’d ever been. We didn’t want someone else to notice that there was no teacher, so we spent the whole period talking quietly in our desks and trying not to draw attention to ourselves. I think it worked, too.
Beth* January 12, 2022 at 2:27 pm My historical-novel-addled mind is now turning this into 8 minutes for a peer of the realm and 15 for a Verified Prince. (Knights and baronets only get 5 minutes.)
EmKay* January 12, 2022 at 2:40 pm Respectable baronets from the College of Heralds do not seduce female patients in clinics.
Elizabeth the Ginger* January 12, 2022 at 2:47 pm Someday my prince will come, someday we’ll meet again…
Anonymouse* January 12, 2022 at 4:58 pm Wizards have no excuse for being late because, you know, teleportation and turning back time.
wendelenn* January 12, 2022 at 5:31 pm A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.
Eric* January 12, 2022 at 2:07 pm If it is someone I work with well, I’m sending a message/e-mail after 5 minutes, and hanging on for another few minutes.
ecnaseener* January 12, 2022 at 2:15 pm Yes, this. Email (or IM) to see if they just forgot, don’t wait to email until after you’ve already left the meeting.
WomEngineer* January 12, 2022 at 2:16 pm I wait 5-10 minutes and then send an IM or email WITH the Zoom window open, just in case they join. 0-5 is no big deal, but by 10-15 it’s time to reschedule.
Insert Clever Name Here* January 12, 2022 at 2:27 pm Yeah, I’d definitely IM (not email) at 5 minutes, “is this still a good time?” If they don’t respond, I log out at 10 minutes and send an email about rescheduling.
Insert Clever Name Here* January 12, 2022 at 2:31 pm Since someone mentioned power dynamics below, a bit of context: I’m not in management and have done this with peers, my direct managers (multiple managers, all of whom I had/have excellent relationships with), and one to two levels up on the org chart. If it was a VP who was late, there’d be someone higher on the org chart than me in the meeting as well and I’d let them handle it (probably while working or checking for a new post on AAM :)).
Lily Rowan* January 12, 2022 at 4:26 pm Yeah, since I can see my manager’s calendar, I know if it’s more likely that her last meeting ran over or that she got engaged in some work and lost track of time. If the latter, I’ll IM her almost immediately (2-3 minutes). If the former, I just hang out in the Zoom with my camera off, doing other work. Or reading AAM :)
Anonym* January 12, 2022 at 2:39 pm Same, exactly. But to be honest, I’m already annoyed at 5 minutes if they haven’t sent word on whether they’re still going to show up. (However, any acknowledgement, then or later, fully removes the annoyance. In the moment it’s irritating.)
Elizabeth the Ginger* January 12, 2022 at 2:51 pm Eh, this does vary based on what kind of workplace you’re in. I’m a teacher and we’re doing some virtual meetings right now even though we’re all on campus. If someone were running late and hadn’t responded to an IM, I’d assume they were dealing with a crying first grader or something.
louvella* January 12, 2022 at 3:07 pm Yeah, I work at a large social services and health care organization, I don’t work directly with clients but a lot of the people I meet with do…people not showing up to a virtual meeting because they were dealing with a crisis is just part of it.
mmppgh* January 14, 2022 at 12:57 am Depends on the person and your company. We use Teams and some staff use it as an IM. If I’m not logged into the meeting, there’s an excellent chance I don’t have Teams open either so I won’t see the message. On the other hand, I always have access to my email.
tamarack & fireweed* January 12, 2022 at 3:34 pm Similar, though I usually wait closer to 10. But after 5 min I’m doing something else and just leaving the Zoom open on mute. Once they come in they can make themselves known. (In real life, what happens is that if anyone is more than 2 min late I’ve nearly always received an email with an apology and a note when they’ll be there. That’s not rare. “I’m still on a call that’s running over and will be there 5-10 min late” happens. If it’s more, then usually the message is more formal and along the lines of “are you still available at x:20 h or should we reschedule?”)
Loulou* January 12, 2022 at 3:35 pm Yes, I was surprised this didn’t come up in the question or answer — my first step when someone doesn’t join a meeting after about 5 minutes is to send a quick email (or chat, if they’re in the org) making sure they have the link and that now is still a good time. Even though I’d be in the wrong if I was 5 or 10 minutes late to a meeting, I’d be sort of miffed if the first I heard from that person was “okay, I’m leaving now” 15 minutes after the meeting was supposed to start.
Smithy* January 12, 2022 at 4:11 pm Right – and while technically it seems like there are 101 ways to tell someone you’re running late to a Zoom meeting, there are also other issues that may happen to delay someone. Their power or internet may have cut out, a fire alarm went off in their building, etc etc. Even if it feels like a true ghosting, the message/email provides an opportunity for follow-up whether a wild situation beyond someone’s control or a case of someone with more power making the executive decision to miss your meeting.
just another bureaucrat* January 12, 2022 at 3:48 pm Agreed, don’t just wait, send a message. Unless I do not care about the meeting at all I always check. On the other hand I’ve definitely had moments where I was caught in another meeting and a message will get me to leave or tell them we’ll reschedule. I rarely wait more than 3 minutes before sending a message. That said, if it’s a Chime meeting I hate you and your tool and I’m always at least 3-5 minutes late because it does not work and I don’t use it enough to learn how to make it work.
Quinalla* January 12, 2022 at 3:53 pm Internal? I either just call them in (Teams) or send a message after 2 minutes, but that is our internal culture. If you are going to be late/miss a meeting you let the person know. After 5, I’m out with another message saying call me in if you get free/get back before the meeting time ends. Again, I think this varies a lot by culture. We start meetings on time, if something with a lot of folks, generally we will give people 1-2 minutes to arrive, smaller meetings we are calling folks in pretty darn quick and then starting. We try to keep are meetings lean and get out of them as quickly as possible so we can get back to it. External I’d wait 10-15 depending on importance, if I knew the person well I’d be texting/emailing after about 5 minutes. For external ones, I’m always camera off, so I just mute and do work that is easy to drop quickly.
UKgreen* January 12, 2022 at 2:07 pm Ten minutes, tops, for anyone. Even if they’re caught up in another late- running call they can ping a ‘be 5 mins’ message!
Roscoe* January 12, 2022 at 2:13 pm Exactly. If its on their calendar, there is no reason they can’t email and say they are running late and give a rough timeframe for when they’ll be availble
MissM* January 12, 2022 at 2:36 pm People who treat my time (or anyone’s) with the same courtesy that they’d give to the President are class acts. Especially when it’s internal and we’re all on the same IM platform. Ditto for ending meetings on time (even if you need to schedule another call later that day).
louvella* January 12, 2022 at 3:10 pm I think it depends on the field…if they’re working at a desk all day, sure, but if someone has a position where they are frequently dealing withc crises, it’s a little different.
num pad on the left* January 12, 2022 at 4:29 pm I agree. I’m in one of those fields. I spent 4 years as the Assistant to The One Who Puts Out Fires, and the past 2 years as The One Who Puts out Fires Which Now Include COVID-Related Flames. If I know I’m going to end up late I try to give a heads-up, but sometimes it’s just not possible.
Lifetime Movie Watcher* January 12, 2022 at 7:07 pm is there a category of The One Who Puts Out Fires Which Now Include COVID-Related Flames But You Have Techie Difficulties Because You Have to Work From Home Because You Have COVID?
Ama* January 12, 2022 at 3:16 pm Yes, we use Teams internally and it’s become standard practice here that if you are running late for a virtual one on one meeting you send a teams chat to the other person to let them know and whether it’s going to be a short delay or if they want to reschedule. If it’s a meeting with an external person who doesn’t show we might send a quick email but we’ll usually wait at least 15 minutes before logging off (we work with a lot of doctors who could get called to a patient emergency at any time, so we’ve had to learn to be flexible).
Tech Worker* January 12, 2022 at 3:51 pm I’m surprised no one has mentioned the scenario where someone is late because they lost track of time. They might just really be in the zone working on something or got distracted by something that happened right before the meeting start time. Usually a Slack ping 5 min in is enough to get their attention in this case and the meeting goes on as normal. Obviously it’s a problem if it happens frequently, but every once in a blue moon is no big deal to me – we’re all human after all. I have done this to others on accident and others have done it to me.
BeenThere* January 12, 2022 at 9:00 pm My grandboss does this all the time, I really love working with him and fortunately he doesn’t seems to mind the slack message or SMS if he is offline.
allathian* January 13, 2022 at 1:51 am It really depends on the culture of the organization. The people I’m in internal meetings with all work exclusively at their computers, so there’s really no excuse if they miss the calendar popup for a scheduled meeting. Our working hours are tracked, but we can basically set them ourselves, the only requirement is to attend meetings we’ve accepted the invitation to, or inform other attendees if we can’t make it after all. Ghosting a meeting is seen as extremely unprofessional, and managers will have words with people who do that. When we switched from Skype to Teams, we started using a default meeting length of 55 minutes for a 1 hour meeting (shorter meetings get the full number of minutes) to give room for bathroom breaks etc. if you’re in back to back meetings. If someone’s running more than a couple minutes late, standard practice here is to IM on Teams. If I don’t get an IM, for a small meeting, I tend to assume technical difficulties, and that’s usually the case. In our team meetings with some 20 attendees, they start on time, although if people aren’t in back to back meetings, we often log in a few minutes early to talk about non-work stuff, and tend to start on the dot regardless of who is late. Except if it’s our manager, and then we’ll just continue talking about non-work stuff until she arrives, or lets us know she can’t make it. But she’s pretty good about rescheduling meetings at least an hour before it’s due to start if she has a conflict. She’s busy, but if she’s busy enough to postpone our team meetings, she’ll let us know.
lost academic* January 12, 2022 at 2:07 pm Send the note before you want or need to bail – that way you have a chance of them seeing it before you have to reschedule. I send them 5-10 minutes in, depending on the audience. And I try to always have something ready to go while waiting – even if it’s just email.
HCW* January 12, 2022 at 2:08 pm I wonder to what extent this varies regionally; I have seen significant cultural differences around the idea of what constitutes “on time.” When I moved to the Northeast, I encountered the “10 minutes early is early, 5 minutes early is on time, and on time is late” mentality. On the west coast, it was common for meetings to routinely start 20 minutes late. Remote meetings seem more timely, but not always.
No Tribble At All* January 12, 2022 at 2:38 pm I loathe the “5 minutes early is on time”. If the meeting starts at 10:00, don’t start on topic until 10:00!
Roscoe* January 12, 2022 at 3:26 pm I get that in theory. But in reality, I feel like, while 5 min may be a lot, if everyone logs in at exactly the right time, chances are you still aren’t starting on time because you are letting people in, people are getting settled, etc.
Kevin Sours* January 12, 2022 at 4:01 pm We’ll start meetings early if everyone happens to be there (and ready to be on task). But you aren’t late until 10:01 (hold on, I need a minute isn’t considered an imposition at 9:58)
Usagi* January 12, 2022 at 4:09 pm This probably depends on the organization (and country/culture), but I’ve worked at plenty of “5 min early is on time” (and sometimes more) places, but never at a place that actually starts 5 min early. It’s more about optics/attendance, i.e., whoever is leading the meeting will start looking around the room about 5 minutes before the scheduled start time and begin keeping tabs on who is there. If you were to show up right at 10 am for a 10 am meeting, you wouldn’t be LATE per se, but the general feeling would be “you could probably plan your time a little better,” if that makes sense. Of course, this was only if it was a pattern, too. Occasional occurences or reasonable explanations were totally fine. I hope I explained that well. English isn’t my first language, and I still have some trouble explaining concepts sometimes. That said, my experience above is both in Japan and in the US.
Usagi* January 12, 2022 at 4:16 pm Sorry, I forgot that I wanted to add that one president I worked with explained his reasons for wanting everyone to show up 10 minutes early to meetings really well, at least in my opinion. If everyone showed up 10 minutes early, they would get all the chatting energy out of the way, and be ready to start at the scheduled start time. Not only did this allow the team time to build rapport, it also meant no one was late to the meeting. This president also wasn’t super strict on that 10 minute time frame, if you showed up 6 minutes before the start time he’d be okay with that too.
Software Dev* January 12, 2022 at 6:07 pm For virtual meetings I login at the exact start time because I want to avoid all the awkward pre-meeting chat about people’s lives xD. So to each their own.
tessa* January 12, 2022 at 8:32 pm “For virtual meetings I login at the exact start time because I want to avoid all the awkward pre-meeting chat about people’s lives…” omg, THIS!!!
Thin Mints didn't make me thin* January 13, 2022 at 5:54 am I used to work in journalism and am accustomed to tight deadlines, so I tend to show up at meetings as the second hand is sweeping up to the 12. Then we spend the first five minutes catching up on our lives while we wait for That One Guy. (It’s usually a guy.)
allathian* January 13, 2022 at 1:59 am I always log in a few minutes early, partly because I’m very definitely in the “5 minutes early is on time, on the hour is late” camp. I get along with my coworkers, and enjoy the occasional non-work chat. I vastly prefer doing it before the actual meeting starts, rather than scheduling virtual coffee breaks to do that. I don’t need 30 minutes or even 15, 5 is plenty to talk about non-work stuff. But we definitely have a few people on our team who always login at the exact start time, presumably to avoid the icebreaker chat. And that’s really the best of both worlds, I think, because those who enjoy non-work chat can have them, and those who don’t, can avoid them without being too obvious about it.
anne of mean gables* January 13, 2022 at 10:06 am This is the bane of my existence. I run/moderate a handful of recurring meetings/lectures, and so have to be on a few minutes early to touch base with the speaker, help troubleshoot screen sharing, etc. – which means I am de facto in charge of the pre-meeting chatter. It is verging on physically painful.
licorice* January 13, 2022 at 2:14 am I guess this works if you don’t have back to back meetings all day.
Anonym* January 12, 2022 at 2:50 pm Checking in with anec-datum from the Northeast, in finance: on time is on time where I work. Early is weird, but people of all levels will usually apologize if they’re 2+ minutes late. I sometimes log into a call 1-2 minutes early and kinda regret it when you have to make awkward conversation for a minute with someone you don’t actually know, or worse, their line is being used by their last call (less common in Zoom times). I would have to do some challenging brain re-wiring to not be angered by meetings starting 20 minutes late.
allathian* January 13, 2022 at 2:00 am I wouldn’t be able to work in an environment where meetings routinely started more than a few minutes late… I’d be angry all the time.
r* January 12, 2022 at 3:17 pm ” When I moved to the Northeast, I encountered the “10 minutes early is early, 5 minutes early is on time, and on time is late” mentality. ” I’ve lived in the Northeast US most of my life, and certainly with an in-person meeting many of us aim to get there early just so we have a buffer and not actually be late. But it’s not that we expect things to start 5 minutes early. The meeting starts at the scheduled time, not early. On time in the meeting room is not late. With virtual, it’s easy to hit it right on time. I think the NE mentality is five minutes before you check your mic, check your lights, etc, so you can hit it a minute early or right on time ready to go.
DarthVelma* January 12, 2022 at 3:46 pm Native Texan here and at my former state agency, everyone showed up 5 minutes early for meetings (unless they were scheduled in back-to-back meetings). We used the time to chat about the weather, the Longhorns, people’s kids, etc. It really fostered a sense of collegiality. I’m in North Carolina now, and we still chat for 5 minutes or more before the real meeting starts…but the meeting starts 10 minutes late. It’s crazy-making.
pancakes* January 12, 2022 at 5:11 pm Yeah – I’ve lived in the northeast my entire life, with the exception of a few months of travel here and there, and this saying is news to me.
Delta Delta* January 12, 2022 at 3:19 pm I’m in the Northeast and I’ve noticed in the last 2 years that people generally show about 2 minutes prior to the scheduled time. I’ve rather enjoyed how things generally run on time now that most things are virtual. It’s been a huge efficiency increase for me.
turquoisecow* January 12, 2022 at 3:22 pm Northeast person here. At my current employer, in person meetings seemed to follow the on time is early rule. I’d get there five minutes late and he the first person there, and that was for an 8:45 meeting. Of course that ran late so the next meeting started late, and by the time my 2:00 meeting happened it was really 2:30 or 3:00 (though thankfully the manager emailed to tell us it was pushed back instead of letting us all stand around awkwardly waiting). Virtual meetings seem to be better, though I think part of it is just that people are having fewer meetings.
Velocipastor* January 12, 2022 at 3:27 pm I had a theater director from the Northeast who used to tell us (middle school and high school students) “Early is on-time. On-time is late. Late is unacceptable.” It is drilled into the fiber of my being
JimmyJab* January 12, 2022 at 3:31 pm For me, in New England: internal meeting, most people show up either on the dot or 1-2 minutes early, external meeting folks tend to be a couple (up to maybe 5) minutes early. Exceptions of course, but if late, folks always apologize.
sam_i_am* January 12, 2022 at 8:57 pm I’m in the Northeast. I usually get to zoom meetings 1 minute early (because that’s when my google timer goes off) and am alone for around 2 minutes when people start joining.
licorice* January 13, 2022 at 2:17 am I work in the Pacific Northwest, and we have a fairly casual grip on time. It’s normal for people to show up 5 minutes late to meetings, and it’s just generally accepted that a meeting won’t start for real until about 5 minutes after the scheduled start time; it’s totally acceptable for people to slide in at all times during the meeting (often because they had an overlap or conflict somewhere else), but definitely during the first 15 minutes or so.
Anon scientist* January 13, 2022 at 7:20 am Same here. Pre covid, for external meetings offsite, external folks would be 15 minutes early and folks from that building would be 5 minutes early. On Zoom, we’re pinging people who aren’t there at the 2 minute mark. Big townhall type meetings start basically on time or maybe a minute late. 5 minutes sounds like an eternity online.
SpecialSpecialist* January 12, 2022 at 2:08 pm Culture around my organization is to shoot someone an IM if it’s been 5-10 minutes and they haven’t logged into the meeting Whenever I’ve had to do this, 9 times out of 10, the person says they’ve gotten held up with another meeting and will be in my meeting within 5 minutes and they’ve usually come in right away. I’ve only had one or two times were I get no response to the IM. In those cases, I hang around until the 10 minute mark and then leave and send them some kind of message to reschedule.
Cordelia* January 12, 2022 at 2:09 pm It would depend how important I thought it was to have the meeting, and how difficult it would be to reschedule. I tend to turn my camera and mike off and just carry on doing emails or whatever until I hear someone else join.
Venus* January 12, 2022 at 3:29 pm I’m a bit surprised by how many people are leaving meetings when others are late. In the world of online meetings I also put myself on mute and do something else. I love the flexibility. If it is someone I know well then I send them a reminder almost right away as they have likely lost track of time, which is easy to do.
Kevin Sours* January 12, 2022 at 4:07 pm A couple of things. First, while not as bad as in person you still end up in a Twilight zone of sorts. You can’t really go heads down on a task when you might be interrupted at any moment. You can’t really go refill your coffee or use the facilities. And if the meeting starts late it’s likely end late. And there are a lot of subtle ways we prep to be “in a meeting” at a particular time. But mostly I burned out years ago on people waltzing into meetings 15 minutes late and expecting everybody to wait around for them or to restart the meeting to accommodate them — usually with nary an apology. It’s disrespectful and demoralizing. I’m done with it. Starting meetings on time communicates the expectation that meetings start on time.
allathian* January 13, 2022 at 2:10 am Yes this. Although to be fair, with perpetual time optimists who are always late to everything, I don’t want an apology, just an acknowledgement of the fact that others find their behavior annoying at best and downright disrespectful at worst. Apologies only work if they intend to change their behavior, but people like this are usually proud of their busy schedules and think it’s unreasonable of others to expect them to be on time. So a bland “sorry I’m late again” doesn’t really help much… And this isn’t even accounting for ND stuff that makes it very hard for people to be on time. But even they should be able to see a calendar popup that a meeting’s about to start in 5 minutes and act accordingly…
Environmental Compliance* January 12, 2022 at 6:16 pm I’d rather make other calls that I need to get done, which I can’t do sitting on Teams Limbo.
Massive Dynamic* January 12, 2022 at 3:34 pm I do this too since all meetings are virtual right now. I’m in billable hour land so I don’t want to bill 15min to a client or my company for a missed meeting when I could be doing something else in that time.
Filosofickle* January 12, 2022 at 4:19 pm Never thought about it before but I guess most of my meetings are important! There are very few I’d walk away from after 5 or even 10 minutes. Most of my calls are about moving a project forward or gathering necessary information so it benefits me to hang on the line and make myself busy while I wait.
licorice* January 13, 2022 at 2:20 am I mean, so are mine – I’m going to assume that most of most people’s meetings are important. But much of my work needs to be done outside of meetings, and it’s a waste of my time if a meeting is scheduled and the person doesn’t show up 10 minutes in – then I’m in Limbo, unable to complete other work but also unable to efficiently move the project forward via the meeting. So nah, if someone hasn’t shown up by 10 minutes in (by which time I have also already pinged them), we’re going to reschedule.
HelloHello* January 12, 2022 at 2:10 pm For internal meetings I give someone 4-5 minutes then send a ping by messenger to see if they’re still available. For client facing meetings, I wait 10-15 minutes, then send an email asking if the time still works for them. If they respond I’ll hop back on the call, but usually I get something along the lines of “sorry I had a schedule issue/something came up/I forgot” response and we reschedule.
allathian* January 13, 2022 at 2:27 am Schedule issues and having something come up I can accept, but saying “I forgot” really wouldn’t be at all acceptable at my org, and I’m grateful for that. It would be considered unacceptable behavior to the point that even if somebody did forget, they’d never say that.
Heidi* January 12, 2022 at 2:10 pm My colleagues seem to be more vigilant about starting on time when it’s zoom. In the rare cases we haven’t logged in within the first 2 minutes, I’ve sent an email after about 5 minutes (“I had us scheduled to meet at XXam – did you want to reschedule?”), then waited for another 5 minutes. There has only been one time that the person didn’t log in right away or reply to the email saying that they got trapped in a subspace anomaly or something and needed to reschedule.
Over It* January 12, 2022 at 2:12 pm Really interested to read the comments here because I think what’s acceptable is going to vary a lot by field, power dynamics, etc. I’m office-based (split between WFH and in office), but I work with a lot of people who are in the field calling in from a public place or their car and often dealing with crises. I usually email people after about five minutes to ask if they need to reschedule, but will keep Zoom open and answer emails while I wait another 10 minutes or so before logging off and letting them know we can reschedule. It’s frustrating but also the nature of my job. But I think for many other contexts, not waiting as long as I do is perfectly acceptable.
Anonym* January 12, 2022 at 2:44 pm I agree that it must vary a lot, but regarding power dynamics, I don’t love giving too much leeway to those up the management chain. Where I am (very large company), even the executives will send a note, or their EA will, often before they’re late. I’ve had folks say it on a call – “I want us to continue this discussion, but let me tell my next meeting I’ll be there at 10 after.” Of course, client and other external power dynamics is a different story.
LizM* January 12, 2022 at 3:41 pm This is what I do too. Our field people work in areas that sometimes have poor cell reception, so it’s not uncommon for them to need to get to a place where their connection is good enough to join the meeting, so I give them a little more time. That said, it’s also part of our culture to let the meeting organizer know if you’re going to be in the field with bad reception, so we can factor that into our decision to wait. If someone had just accepted a meeting and not communicated with me about any anticipated issues logging on, I’ll still give them about 10 min.
Roscoe* January 12, 2022 at 2:12 pm So, I’m in Sales and I work with potential clients. Most of my meeting blocks are 20 minutes, so not a ton of time anyway. Usually what I do is give it 2 minutes, then call/leave a voicemail saying “I’ll leave it open another 5 minutes”. At that point, I sent them an email saying something like “I understand when unexpected things come up, let me know when you can reschedule” I can say, I’ve rarely had someone more than 7 minutes late show up at all. Typically they were going to blow it off anyway at that point, so waiting around is just wasting my own time. That said, if it was a BIG client, or a meeting scheduled for much longer, I may give a bit more leeway, but still probably not more than 10 min. If they are more than 10 minutes late, they aren’t being respectful of my time and can reschedule.
Dr. Rebecca* January 12, 2022 at 2:12 pm I go with 1/3 of the total meeting time for meetings up to 45 minutes in length, and then a flat 15 minutes for longer meetings.
Language Lover* January 12, 2022 at 2:12 pm If it’s a client, I usually give it about ten minutes and send a follow-up. But client in my case isn’t really someone who is paying me. I’m usually helping them. If it’s a peer, I usually wait about five minutes before I try IMing them through TEAMS. If they don’t respond, I either IM them or email them to let me know when they become free and log off. I remain available even if I’m not logged in for at least 20 – 30 minutes before feeling like I can reschedule that time.
GS* January 12, 2022 at 2:14 pm I’ll usually send out an email or ping if someone as 3 – 5 min late with a “the line is open!” if you hit 7 – 10 min and they’re not there, we’ll just cancel if they’re necessary or start without them. Most of our meetings are 15 – 30 min so if you’re MIA with no response…we gotta move on.
Lucious* January 12, 2022 at 2:19 pm PM here. This is how I handle these scenarios. If the attendee is critical to the meeting, I give them five minutes to either show up or communicate whether or not they’re coming. Typically, someone will chime in that “John Bigshot” is stuck in a meeting and plans to join shortly. If the group hears nothing in six minutes, meeting adjourned. If the tardy individual is important but not a “John Bigshot”, ill proceed without them and accomplish whatever business can be done without their presence. That item I need them for then becomes a one-off or a follow up meeting later. Time is money, whether you’re doing business virtually or in person.
X* January 12, 2022 at 2:19 pm I’d give 10-15 minutes regardless of the title of the person is. If a VP doesn’t know by now what meetings will run long and schedule accordingly, that’s for them to sort out. If a decision has go be delayed because a VP has yet to figure out time management and/or any relevant life hacks, that’s on the VP. They get paid the big bucks, get a life coach or go on one of those retreats or something.
Nikki* January 12, 2022 at 2:24 pm I just had this happen this morning! Glad to see Alison agrees with how I handled it. It was a teammate and I was doing them a favor and walking them through some things they didn’t understand. After five minutes, I left the meeting and IMed them that I’d be available when they were ready. They pinged me 5 minutes later to apologize and say they were ready.
Person from the Resume* January 12, 2022 at 2:25 pm Maybe it’s just how I work, but if I join a meeting and the other person is not there yet, I pull up another window and work until I here the other attendee speaking or until I realize it’s been long enough that they’re not just running late and I IM. I could stay online and “attend” the entire meeting while continuing to work on other things if they never show up. Again, based on how we work, I’d expect the person to be running late from another meeting or task so I can IM them ask them what’s going on and since they’re working, they’re online.
Person from the Resume* January 12, 2022 at 2:28 pm And I mute my mic so I can work without them hearing me if they do come on. We don’t use video.
Rusty Shackelford* January 12, 2022 at 3:32 pm That’s the great thing about virtual meetings – I’m not stuck in a conference room doing nothing while I wait.
BeenThere* January 13, 2022 at 12:59 pm 100%, although I still have to listen to dead conference instead of the youtube channel I was using to keep squirrel brain happy I still enjoy being able to knock off small tasks while I wait. The downside is I’m a programmer. If you’ve blocked me into a meeting then I’ve probably put all my meetings close to it because the code needs a two hour block. If you are late to a meeting you booked during my code block for a day then I will never accept another meeting of yours during that block. The cost is too high to my productivity.
Lizard* January 12, 2022 at 2:31 pm I usually wait about 5 minutes, then follow up with a chat message asking if they would like to reschedule. I do this for those above, below, or same as me in the organization. Works every time. For clients, I wait longer (10 minutes), but still ask if they would like reschedule if they are a no-show.
Lizard* January 12, 2022 at 2:37 pm Also want to note that the above is what do for 1:1s. For group calls, I don’t hold up the meeting unless it’s a decision maker who is late… and even then, I still check in with a private chat to see if they still plan on attending.
animaniactoo* January 12, 2022 at 2:42 pm In general, we seem to have a standard among people I know, 5 minutes is when you send a text to say “hey, did you forget about the meeting?” and 10 is when you call it and say “let me know when you’re free and we’ll figure out when we can do that.
anonymous73* January 12, 2022 at 2:42 pm I try to IM them while I’m waiting to see if they’ll be able to make it at all or if they’re just running behind. And I always work on something while I’m waiting if possible so I’m not wasting time. If someone is habitually late then you need to speak to them and see what’s up.* But if it’s just once in a while, give them a break. Yes it’s annoying, but sometimes people get caught up in something and lose track of time. *The caveat is with a manager/director because IME they’re running from meeting to meeting all day so it happens more often. And while it may take less time to exit one meeting and enter another, they may need a bio break or to grab something to eat/drink.
Flying Fish* January 12, 2022 at 2:43 pm We have a 15 minute cut off for patients coming in for office visits. Longer than that and we can ask the patient to reschedule (although we usually find a way to accommodate and just warn them for next time!)
Dole* January 12, 2022 at 8:03 pm Yet, when a patient does this when their provider is the one running 15+ minutes late, it often results in a late fee for rescheduling without at least 24 hours notice.
Xaraja* January 12, 2022 at 2:46 pm I work for a medium sized company (a few hundred employees). Most of my meetings that aren’t just attending company wide informational meetings a few times a month are with my close coworkers in the IT department, including my boss and grand boss. My grand boss is notorious for having meetings run over because he it’s super knowledgeable and actually explains stuff (i always learn stuff so i like his meetings, i dunno about other people). So if he’s late usually someone has to look and see if he’s in his office and on the phone. Other coworkers I’ll just PM them on the system after a couple minutes because they’ve probably missed the reminder or Outlook might have not had a reminder set – some meeting organizers are bad about sending meetings that don’t have reminders enabled. Meetings with customers are usually only 30 minutes and i think i wait about 15-20 minutes. But i can always work on something quietly or talk about something with my other coworkers on the call.
General von Klinkerhoffen* January 12, 2022 at 2:48 pm I’m pretty sure we’ve had conversations here about scheduling meetings for 20 or 50 minutes precisely so there’s time for a slight overrun and still making it to the next meeting in reasonable time. If your culture is to have back to back meetings, building in five-minute breathing space between sessions is vital even for comfort breaks, otherwise it’s inevitable people will be late.
plest* January 12, 2022 at 2:48 pm My company has a culture of starting meetings 5 min after – i.e 1:05 – 1:30 instead of 1-1:30. Try that? People tend to show up on time. Otherwise, 5 is my limit for 30 min meeting, 8 for an hour.
After 33 years ...* January 12, 2022 at 3:07 pm At our place, people would turn up at 1:10. A neighbouring institution decided to cure their Friday student attendance problem by not having Friday classes. Attendance dropped sharply on Thursdays.
PT* January 12, 2022 at 3:21 pm My work did this too. It was partially because we had a lot of offsite meetings (so people were arriving just for the meeting, and had a slightly different commute that day, had to find parking, etc.) and partially because we worked in abject chaos and it was impossible to walk from your office to a conference room without someone asking you an “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie” sort of question.
Wisteria* January 12, 2022 at 4:12 pm I did not know what this meant, so I googled. I was led to the Goodreads page and to this gem of a review, which I had to share: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/680231064?book_show_action=true&from_review_page=1
Nanani* January 12, 2022 at 4:35 pm That might work if the problem is logistical like, the hallway/parking lot is hard to navigate for on-the-dot times, but if not then you might just have people showing up at 1:10 for a 1:05 meeting.
Rara Avis* January 12, 2022 at 7:57 pm Once a month we have meetings that pull together employees from 4 sites. For 17 years my site hosted. Now we don’t and I’m so sad about it. It is not possible for most of us from my site to be on time to the new location because we can’t leave our site until a certain time, and traffic doesn’t allow us to traverse the distance in the time allowed. Solution? Start the meetings 15 minutes later — but no one wants to leave them 15 minutes later at the end of the day. (We can’t host anymore because we moved to a new location and there isn’t any parking for visitors.)
TiredEmployee* January 12, 2022 at 2:49 pm I tend to pre-empt this in 1-1 meetings, especially ones I’ve scheduled, by sending an IM at the start time asking if now is still a good time. Usually that results in them immediately calling me, or saying “give me five minutes to finish the email”.
Lab Boss* January 12, 2022 at 2:51 pm 5-10 minutes before I message them in some way to ask if they’re coming (depending on the planned length and urgency of the meeting, our relative power differential, and whether they’re someone I know is usually a little late or someone who’s always spot-on). But I don’t usually disconnect at all for quite a while. I usually have my headset on all day either for calls, to get alerts without bothering the whole cubicle area, or for listening to music. I’ll make sure my mic is muted and minimize the call window. If the other party metaphorically comes staggering into the room 20 minutes late, then I’m still there and we can do whatever business time allows. If they no-show me, the cost was nothing.
LadyByTheLake* January 12, 2022 at 2:53 pm Honestly, I often stay on as long as I can because that is good, quiet time when I can get work done, but internal systems show that I am in a meeting. I’ll stay on until the system kicks me out sometimes because I lose track of time since I’m actually getting things accomplished.
Kevin Sours* January 12, 2022 at 3:03 pm Five minutes and I don’t care who it is internally. I’d be a little more lenient on external people based on how much I need their good will. But I ran out of fucks several years ago and am in a position to weather the blow back one way or another (so don’t necessarily try this at home)
Saraquill* January 12, 2022 at 3:03 pm I recently had an online interview where the interviewer was over 20 minutes late. I was concerned until I realized we were in different time zones and I’d tuned in an hour early by mistake.
MCMonkeyBean* January 12, 2022 at 3:10 pm For an internal meeting, if you have a message system in place it would be pretty common in my office to send someone a message after a bit of time asking if they are logging in or need to reschedule. I’ve had to message a boss who was caught up in another meeting and she asked to reschedule, and I’ve been messaged by my boss when I just had my head down too long and didn’t notice the outlook reminder go off! Sometimes they may have just lost track of time or been in the bathroom when outlook dinged or something so a little message might be enough to get the meeting going!
CJ* January 12, 2022 at 3:13 pm It depends. If I’m just around for the meeting, ten minutes. If I’m doing other things on the computer, I’ve a Powerpoint slide I can toss up (replacing the camera) that says that “I’m around in another window, speak up.”
PT* January 12, 2022 at 3:17 pm I just had this happen in a Zoom appointment with my doctor and called it in: the receptionist said to expect the doctor to be up to 30 minutes late. I was surprised because that office runs so efficiently I’m often done with my appointment before its scheduled start time.
June* January 12, 2022 at 8:59 pm I work in medicine. Covid is killing us. Please be patient:) The ten minute rule does not apply to healthcare.
Doctor is In* January 13, 2022 at 8:29 am Doctor here. We often juggle telehealth visits with patients who have to come to the office, and may “see” the telehealth patients 15-20 minutes earlier or later than their appointment time (with their permission/notification). They are usually fine with it, and that way we don’t keep a patient in the office waiting.
mreasy* January 12, 2022 at 3:25 pm I send an email after 5 minutes confirming it’s still a good time and offering to reschedule if not. After 11 minutes I disconnect and send another email on that thread saying sorry that we missed each other, let’s reschedule.
just another bureaucrat* January 12, 2022 at 4:00 pm I love the teams popup when the first person joins the meeting thing. Honestly it’s what keeps me on my meetings far far more than anything else. If it’s a zoom, or ugh-Chime, or something else then I’m more likely to be late, they are generally vendor meetings (I would be the client in those cases). In part because I don’t get the lovely little “John started the meeting. Join/Message” option which is great, because if I know I’m going to be late or we need to move it I can just click and send it. But in part because zoom uninstalls itself every 3-5 days on our computers at work, and because Chime is evil, and half the time WebEx wants me to remember login credentials I use like once a quarter. In part using the same tools all the time makes things easier and if you know you are on a different tool for someone who is a frequent meeting goer it might be hard. The opposite is true, if this is someone who is almost never in online meetings it can sometimes take a long time to get it all set up the first time and you may not know that going in. That said, message people early. It would be really rare for me to sit around waiting for 5 minutes, or for 5 minutes to go by without someone having messaged me. If you’re in a larger group make sure someone actually acknowledges/owns the sending a message to the missing person. It ends up in a kind of everyone says you should but no one hits send on the message if you don’t have someone specific doing it. I would give longer to anyone on a new/different than normal platform before I just left.
Imaginary Friend* January 13, 2022 at 7:57 pm > zoom uninstalls itself every 3-5 days on our computers at work What the what?
Just Here for the Free Lunch* January 12, 2022 at 4:03 pm For a 1:1 I’ll wait about 5 minutes before I send a chat or text asking if they’re still available. I almost never have to do that because usually the late party will typically reach out to me first and ask to reschedule or tell me they’re going to be X minutes late. I’ve only rarely sat on a Zoom and had the person no-show. In those cases I have disconnected and sent a “sorry we missed each other” note. For larger internal groups our standard is to give latecomers about 2-3 minutes (sitting in silence on a Zoom is excruciating!) and then get started without them. We have a meeting-heavy culture, and people are frequently booked back to back, so even if the late person is a VP they’re usually understanding that a meeting will get started relatively on time and they’ll catch up. (That said, I am also the LW who updated last week about a meeting host starting the meeting over again when someone important joined near the end, so I’m super-appreciative that the people I work with now are considerate!)
junior* January 12, 2022 at 4:11 pm If it’s an interview, I wait 10 minutes. If it’s a team meeting, I wait 5 (if no one shows up, it was probably cancelled and I didn’t get notice). If it’s a one-on-one with pretty much anyone, I just hang out virtually while working in case they’re able to show up on time.
Phony Genius* January 12, 2022 at 4:14 pm I have waited on a conference call for a virtual presentation for over an hour. I wanted to see what would happen, so I just left my speaker phone on. I convinced three others to do the same. They connected the call 75 minutes into it, with 15 minutes left, claiming some sort of technical issue, and just kept going without recapping what was missed for those on the call. (There was a small audience in-person who saw the whole thing.) Someone there told me that they just “forgot” to connect the call. In summary, if staying on and waiting does not preclude me from doing other work, I just stay connected as per schedule, getting ahead on other assignments.
miss manager* January 12, 2022 at 4:26 pm Many good suggestions here. I’ll just add that before I suggest that someone stood me up, I double/triple check that I’ve got the appointment day and time correct. Meetings get cancelled or rescheduled and sometimes the email gets overlooked, or you know, sometimes we get a bit disoriented when every day feels like Blursday in Covid times.
Rachael* January 12, 2022 at 4:29 pm Teams has a function that you can opt into the pop-ups that appear on the right hand bottom corner. I usually wait 5 minutes and then send a chat in the meeting bubble and say something like “looks like you are caught up in something. I’ll wait until I see you pop in”. That usually gives them a chance to respond if they are just running late. Then, I just look for the pop up.
Sabine the Very Mean* January 12, 2022 at 4:38 pm My boss used to send empty meeting requests and then not show up and send a note saying, “start without me!”. And none of us would know why we were there. Being a boss means try to always be on time and prepared or it will look like you’re abusing your power as no one will feel like they can call you out.
Imaginary Number* January 12, 2022 at 4:57 pm If you have access to the person’s calendar, it’s useful to check to see if they’re coming from somewhere else like an off-site, in-person meeting. If I know someone is probably going to be hustling from one meeting to the next, I’ll give them a bigger buffer.
Valkyrie* January 12, 2022 at 5:10 pm I typically phone or text after 7 minutes. I reschedule after 15 minutes, with a few exceptions. This is because I am in a role (e.g. dentist, therapist, lawyer) where you’re going to get billed regardless; you get billed for 1 hour, and I am not going to go over my hour. If I booked 4-5 pm for you, you’re paying for 4-5 pm. If I mysteriously have time to say late so you can see me for an hour, you’ll be paying for 1.5 hours. Honestly, my social rules are kind of similar – if we agree to 4 pm, I won’t necessarily tell you to go home if you show up at 4:20 pm, but you better bloody well have told me you’d be late.
Jam Today* January 12, 2022 at 5:11 pm I thought the 10 minute rule was a universal constant? Its been a constant for me since high school anyway.
Belkro Biz* January 12, 2022 at 5:56 pm I work a caseload of clients and my rule of thumb is: email them with the meeting info at three minutes and tell them I’ll wait till 10 after but otherwise we’ll need to reschedule. For what it’s worth, I’ve seen an increase in no shows since New Years. Anecdotally, it appears to be folks catching or caring for those with COVID.
Pay No Attention To The Man Behind The Curtain* January 12, 2022 at 6:18 pm For SOME types of video meetings, I’ll just have myself muted and no video for the duration scheduled time slot or until they show up, but I can keep working; that’s only happened about 3 times during the pandemic. Usually I have the opposite problem of everyone starts showing up 3 minutes early, and then that becomes the new accepted start time, so the next meeting people arrive 5 minutes early, and then the next meeting it’s 7… and so on. No one wants to be “late”.
Kevin Sours* January 12, 2022 at 8:19 pm I make a point when a “straggler” apologizes for arriving at exactly the start time to mention that they were on time.
Environmental Compliance* January 12, 2022 at 6:23 pm The standard here seems to be wait 5 minutes, ping whoever you’re waiting for, and if they haven’t messaged back or shown up within 15 minutes, you’re free to leave or continue on without them. We will also use the “request to call” button in Teams if it’s really important that they’re there. There is only one person that I think that would get an extended timeframe, and they have never been more than 5 minutes late – and have always apologized. That would be the CEO. I do not keep the Teams call window open because this blocks me from other Teams calls and phone calls. If I get the ping that people have joined later to the meeting, I’ll go ahead and rejoin at that time. Usually people here are really good at being on time, but I’m pretty sure part of that is because of that nice Teams notice that pops up when someone joins.
nnn* January 12, 2022 at 8:00 pm I didn’t realize until I read this thread that we as a society have crossed the invisible threshold where we no longer think “they must be having technical difficulties” and now think “they’re late!”
pancakes* January 13, 2022 at 9:31 am I don’t think it’s at all reasonable to take a q&a on a blog as representing all of society, but either way, people who are having technical difficulties joining a meeting will typically have multiple options to communicate that. A text or an IM or quick call to the host or another attendee saying that you can’t connect is a good way to clarify that you’re not late. If someone hasn’t done that, it’s pretty safe to assume they’re running late.
Xaraja* January 13, 2022 at 11:04 am Agreed. I had technical difficulties in my first interview for the job i have now – during 2020 with video interviews, my laptop worked fine for tests but day of the camera wouldn’t work! The other day my coworker was having trouble getting into a Teams meeting with Microsoft support (yes really) so he messaged me and i told them what was going on.
Dole* January 12, 2022 at 8:08 pm After 5 minutes, I try to call them on Teams, then wait another 2 or so minutes, try to call them again, then send a friendly message that we need to reschedule, and then leave the meeting window. And ignore them when they try to have an ad hoc meeting 30 minutes later and I’m working on something else or wrapping up for the day. Boundaries.
Edwina* January 13, 2022 at 12:21 am After 5 minutes, send a message/email/text to them–or if they’re a big VP, to their assistant. You can ask if you’re sitting in the right link, or if you got the time wrong. Usually you hear back right away — VP is delayed on another call, etc. If you don’t hear back after 10 minutes, I’d log off, sending an email to explain. If it’s a peer or a subordinate “Sorry, I had to jump off to another call” or “not sure what happened–LMK so we can resched”; if it’s a VP “Sorry, I must have mixed up our dates, let me know when we can reschedule” (sent to their assistant).
Legal aid* January 13, 2022 at 12:57 am 15 minutes the first time, 10 any time it happens after that. We developed this system after an external contract manager no showed to our zoom meetings twice. The first time she emailed 35 minutes into the forty five minute meeting to say that she really needed to meet “for five minutes.” We did and it ended up being 45. Never again. For clients I give them 20 minutes and if not they have to reschedule- I’m a legal aid lawyer and assume my clients often have a lot going on so I try to err on the side of kindness there.
Birch* January 13, 2022 at 3:56 am I think it really depends on who is joining the meeting and what you know of their usual habits! I wouldn’t wait more than 5 minutes for my supervisor because she’s always earlier than I am, and messages me if she’ll be late. For teaching, I’ll wait to start until I have at least half the class, or for 5 minutes, whichever comes first, and if it’s being recorded I might not wait that long. Recorded teaching is great in that sense–the stragglers can always go back and watch what they missed. I’m realizing we have a system that would (rightfully) drive most people bonkers (and to be fair, it does drive me bonkers much of the time)! In my uni, much of the scheduling is on the “academic quarter” meaning classes by default start at 15 past the hour. Supposedly this is because of the church bells ringing on the hour, giving students notice that they have 15 minutes to get to the next class. It confuses the heck out of international students and staff because some of the course times are listed as starting on the hour, but everybody knows they won’t start till 15 past. BUT most admin meetings actually do start on the hour, with some exceptions that nobody ever bothers to explain outright. So we often find ourselves joining a meeting on the hour just to be safe and then waiting for 17 minutes for the stragglers who thought it was starting on the quarter. Most of the time it ends up casual work-related chatting between the people who did join early.
Katie* January 13, 2022 at 4:25 am I have a 10-15 minute rule with clients. If they haven’t shown after 10 I drop them an email along the lines of “I’m on the call now if you’re available? If not let me know when would suit to reschedule”. That prompts some to dial in who forgot or missed the meeting reminder, but if I hear nothing else I’ll log off after 15.
Pam Poovey* January 13, 2022 at 7:27 am If it’s someone I work closely with, I’d probably shoot them a text after 5 minutes. With no reply I’d give them another 5, and if they respond that would dictate my next move. External clients and higher-ups who I don’t have a texting relationship with would get 10-15 based on how badly I need to talk to them. Then email to reschedule.
Ping* January 15, 2022 at 10:59 am I give ppl exactly 3 mins to join before pinging them on Teams – Hi, Are you able t join the meeting? Mostly they respond at that time with the reason..