Ask a Manager

Remember the letter-writer whose new hire was monitoring the whole team’s calendars and commenting on them? The first update was here, and here’s the conclusion. As predicted, Seniority Susan didn’t make it. I delivered a PIP with explicit expectations for behavior modification outlined. At the time, Susan did not give me much hope that change […]

Remember the letter-writer whose employee refused to do her job and would lead her in (bizarre) circles about why she wouldn’t? Here’s the update. Thank you for publishing my letter last year. Prompted by a recent question, I thought an update on my Bartleby might be of interest. Though timing meant that I couldn’t take […]

Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. My employee misses key details in meetings (#2 at the link) Your advice and that of your commenters really helped. Reading the comments helped me approach the conversation with a better sense of curiosity rather than some more negative assumptions I had been carrying. The commenters proposed […]

Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. Intern wants me to drive him to and from work Thank you for your support and insight. I’m so appreciative of your comments. Some items, to clarify: – I’m female; boss is female; husband is male; intern is male. – Boss made promises to the college consortium […]

Remember the letter-writer whose new coworker was their boss from before their gender transition? Here’s the update. Thanks again for running the letter. While I had to eventually nope out of the comments (I found the assumptions some commenters made that I was utterly panicking about the situation a little strange), I gained a lot […]

Here are three updates from past letter-writers. 1. The organization I volunteer with is exploding in drama and rage-quitting Thank you for publishing your thoughtful answer to my question – I have an update to share. After a week of hemorrhaging volunteers from the program and generally being taken to task by those who were […]

Remember the letter-writer asking how transparent to be with an employee about why they’re not promoting him? Here’s the update. Thanks for responding to my letter and thanks to readers for commenting. Yes, I am aware that it is ridiculous the nepotism policy isn’t better worded. Unfortunately changing that policy is not within my power […]

Here are four updates from past letter-writers. 1. Can I invite only women and LGBTQ+ coworkers to a private movie screening? I’m the letter writer who wrote to you about organizing a private screening of a movie. I ended up not inviting any colleagues. I’m relatively senior in our office, so I decided to avoid […]

Remember the letter-writer whose “hybrid” team was using him as their way to not go to the office at all? Here’s the update. Thank you for your input. The situation did have an interesting resolution: someone got fired over this but (maybe surprisingly) it wasn’t me. My boss was the only other member of my […]

Remember the letter-writer who worked in an office where a lunchtime “thought experiment” had caused a cold war? Here’s the update. Thank you for answering my question. I want to update you, because even though it was difficult, after reflection I did see your point about previous disinclination toward Carrie before the thought experiment conversation. […]