you should contact your laid-off coworkers

A reader writes:

I wanted to reach out in regards to your advice to the letter-writer asking about collecting cash for a laid-off coworker with an additional tip. I was laid off last week from my job due to the economic impact of coronovirus on our company. I worked at a nonprofit that relies on donor dollars to fund its operations, and as one of the newer hires, I was expecting to be included in the layoffs when they were announced. Because of that, I had already started my job search and was fortunate to land a part-time temporary position elsewhere.

That said, being laid off is not fun. My advice is to those who are not included in layoffs at a company: reach out to your former coworkers. A simple text to ask how someone is doing goes a long way. Being stuck at home with no social interaction makes being laid off during this pandemic particularly difficult. You can’t go out to get a drink with a friend. You are stuck home alone.

Anyway, just wanted to pass along this tip to have people please reach out to former coworkers. It isn’t going to make us feel bad that they weren’t included in layoffs — it will be reassuring to know that our former coworkers liked working with us and are thinking of us.

Heartily seconding this. I’ve received a lot of letters over the years from people surprised and hurt that they never heard from their coworkers after getting laid off. Reach out to people! Let them know you’re thinking about them and liked working with them, and offer to stay in touch for job leads, references, etc. (There’s a suggested script here.) People will appreciate it.

{ 78 comments… read them below }

  1. Potatoes gonna potate*

    This is nice. It would be nice for others to reach out. I feel like I’ve been doing all the work of reaching out and keeping in touch. I m not taking it personally, I get how it is. eventually things will level out. Sucks in the meantime though.

    1. Minocho*

      I have it very good compared to many, right now, and I am feeling the strain as time passes. I am trying really hard to be kind and forgiving, as I see others I love react out of their stress, and I am trying to also be proactively gracious and grateful right now, to acknowledge everything from a friend having the time to connect a bit, double tips for restaurant prepared food, to the coworker who is able to provide work product in this difficult time.

      Something like this falls into that category, and I’m glad the OP mentioned it.

      I think even we introverts are realizing what social creatures humans really are right now.

      Take care, everybody!

  2. cheeky*

    It never occured to me to take this personally, and I would actually find it awkward to talk to someone who was still employed by a company that laid me off, unless that person was a friend.

    1. cheeky*

      Like, I’m not sure that would make me feel better at all, to talk to someone who was spared a layoff.

      1. The Original K.*

        In my situation, my former colleagues definitely were not friends, but it was just nice to not be totally erased. The messages were mostly things like “happy to be a reference” or “I heard ABC Industries is hiring,” or “I hope you’re doing okay.” There was one person who was LIVID on my behalf, which was kind of funny because she was a very small, timid (her words) person, so hearing that kind of vitriol from her was unexpected.

        I didn’t take the layoff personally and I was upset about losing my income and benefits, not about no longer working there. But it’s still upsetting, and it was just nice to have the blow be softened a bit – especially by people who provided job leads.

        1. Mama Bear*

          If I didn’t know someone super well (like not a lunch friend), I’d at least offer to be a reference and give future contact info. Sometimes it’s just nice to know someone cares that you are gone.

        2. SheLooksFamiliar*

          ‘… it was just nice to not be totally erased.’

          I think this is one of the hardest things for people to handle after they’ve been laid off. They didn’t just lose a job, they lost part of their identity. They’re no longer Coordinating Administrator or Chief Cook and Bottle Washer at ABC Company. They’re not part of a team or its work dynamic. They have days to fill and no work-buddies to talk to. They used to belong someplace, and now they don’t.

          Even if their former colleagues don’t do more than say ‘Hi, we miss you,’ or ‘How are you doing?’ it will make a difference. Maybe the job went away, but it feels good knowing the connections they made with the people they worked with did not.

          1. Potatoes gonna potate*

            I agree with this and this is a good point, that’s been my struggle, in addition to losing my income and shaky benefits, losing my identity and the relationships I made there. I’ve read too many things that lean towards the work is work and we shouldn’t have any emotional attachment to work but that’s not realistic. I think far more people are like this than are comfortable to admit. I know in person I am not comfortable admitting that to anyone.

          2. lonestarbrooklyn*

            Cosigned! I left in November and the total silence from everyone, including a couple of people I considered myself friends with, was pretty hard on me. Even if the end was rough and you think they might not want to hear anything from the workplace, a quick “it was good working with you” could be huge.
            I was also reminded of something I heard once: no matter how much you love the job, it will not love you back.

      2. Retro*

        I think it really depends on your relationship with that person. If Joe from Accounting who I only ever talk to once a year sends me a long message about how he’s sorry I’ve been laid off, it can come off as insincere. But if someone on my team checks in to say hello then I wouldn’t mind hearing from them. Though layoffs often feel personal, the decision usually isn’t made solely based on performance. There are a multitude of reason: elimination or shrinkage of a team/job function or first-in-first-out policies. But it is important for someone to recognize their difference in circumstance when contacting a laid-off coworker and be sensitive to the fact that layoffs are a sucky thing.

    2. Roscoe*

      For me, as someone who has gone through a layoff, its more about you as a person than someone who used to work there. No one is saying you have to reach out to everyone. But if its someone you would regularly get coffee with or have lunch with, and you can’t even bother to send a quick text or linkedin message saying “I’m so sorry to hear what happened, I enjoyed working with you, I hope you land on your feet”, then to me that is pretty crappy.

      1. Potatoes gonna potate*

        Exactly. esp if you have the kind of relationship with someone where you talk to them every day, or go to lunch or grab coffee etc. I know a lot of people here skew towards the “work is for work not socializing” but there’s a good number of people who actually have built relationships with colleagues. So to suddenly have those relationships disappear is a little jarring.

        1. Kim. B.*

          I think that’s fine. I just don’t think it works as universal advice. I’m not the kind of person who has those relationships at work, and I would find it incredibly awkward if people were to contact me after I was laid off. I’d think it was much more about them trying to alleviate feelings of guilt than about me, since I wouldn’t actually want that.

          Basically, I think it’s important to consider what you know of the person before you decide to “reach out”. Clearly the OP of this post would welcome it. Many others would too. But I wouldn’t, and there will be others who wouldn’t either. There’s no one side fits all answer here, and it’s far too simplistic to just say “do this, everyone will appreciate it”. That’s all.

          1. Potatoes gonna potate*

            Of course, there’s no one size fits all advice, and that goes for majority of pretty much any advice given here and elsewhere.

  3. The Original K.*

    Thirding this. I was pleasantly surprised when my former coworkers reached out after a layoff. I remember being pleasantly surprised when I woke up the next day to emails from them. Many had reached out to the six-person team that had been laid off individually.

    Messaging is important though. My best friend was laid off recently and she says people have been reaching out to her … to find out if she knows if more layoffs are coming. She is not enjoying that outreach.

    1. Iron Chef Boyardee*

      Wait a minute. People who are still working at the company are contacting this person who got laid off and is no longer working there, to see if she knows about any future layoffs?

      I don’t get the logic. If she’s no longer working there, how would she know?

      And even if she did… well, if I was the one who got laid off and I was in the position your friend is in, if I somehow did have information about future layoffs, I’m not sure I’d be so willing to share it under those circumstances.

      1. The Original K.*

        Yep. It’s basically “sorry about your layoff but what about me?” Not cool.

    2. Jeffrey Deutsch*

      I’m told that sometimes, former co-workers will call the laid-off person to try to find out why s/he got laid off.

      If the person had done something wrong or messed up, they’ll be relieved. Otherwise, uh oh…they could be next.

      How often do you think that happens?

  4. Roscoe*

    AMEN. I commented on that one was well saying something similar. I was laid off right before Christmas. The fact that only one person reached out really made me re-evaluate my opinion of the rest of the people I thought I was “work” close with. To be honest, it even makes me consider whether I would ever help them out in the future if they reached out to me.

    1. PMBS*

      Yikes. Just before Christmas makes it even harder to take for a lot of folks. Even people who aren’t religious get that.

      I’m not defending your former co-workers (you know them and that workplace culture), but sometimes people just don’t know what to say, so they put it off, and never circle back to it…

      The thing is, though, that this can have consequences. Jobs end. Life happens. And when it happens to one of your former colleagues, will they be able to reach out to you for references, job leads, or just a conversation? Because they didn’t do that for you, they’ve cut themselves off from that kind of support when they need it.

      Like so many things in life, avoidance is not a wise strategy.

  5. Bend & Snap*

    I got laid off in January (not COVID related) and nobody but my work BFF reached out to me. However, the whole team reached out to HER to see how she was doing because they knew she’d be upset.

    My last day, and farewell note, went unacknowledged. It suuuuuucked.

  6. What's In A Name?*

    Thanks for this prompt! We had to not-renew a contractor due to covid, and I hadn’t thought about reaching out to see if he’d landed a new gig. But thanks to this post, I just did!

  7. Tea.Earl Grey. Hot.*

    I was ruminating on this today. I left my old place of work for another job during this entire pandemic mess, and was implored by many colleagues to “keep in touch.” I’m wondering about how often I should reach out, and what I should talk about. (These aren’t necessarily friends I’ve had outside of work that I met at work, but I wouldn’t mind developing some into those). I guess topics are easy enough right now (How are you, how are you faring,etc), but do you email? Text? Call? When? Thoughts?

    1. Anonapots*

      I think email is best right now. Text feels more immediate and an email gives them options. And whenever you think to do it is fine. I’m fortunate that my work is through a government contractor and due to the contractual obligations, it’s necessary to keep us at least on the payroll, so nobody has been let go, but if one of us had to be laid off, I would reach out. My group is small and pretty close knit, so maintaining contact would be important.

  8. Skippydo*

    Yes! I definitely agree. And I think this recommendation certainly applies to those of us who have been furloughed, too. I’ve been furloughed for a couple of weeks now – much of my company has been, due to the nature of our business – and it’s unsettling to consider the possibility the industry will be hampered for years to come and some of us may not be brought back. Receiving texts from a few of my coworkers who want to check in has been so nice. And phone calls are even better – it’s so good to chat and laugh. Work friends are, as previous posts here have discussed, people we work with that we need to be pleasant to whether we like them or not in order to be professional and do our jobs well.

    I once read somewhere that a measure of a person’s character is how they treat someone who can’t do anything for them. What a nice surprise when someone shows they care even when there’s no work or projects at stake, when they won’t be getting any credit in the workplace for their efforts in reaching out to you. and that YOU and your well-being is important to them. It’s been cool to discover who those people are.

    1. RobotWithHumanHair*

      I was furloughed last week and apart from a few Instagram conversations with one colleague (who was also furloughed) and a couple basic company-wide update emails from the GM, I haven’t heard boo from anyone.

      I feel so in the dark that I’m only certain of me and five others that were furloughed. Not a clue who else is or isn’t still working. It’s rather demoralizing. But it is what it is.

    2. Chaordic One*

      You’re so very right about this. I know that my job is safe and that I’ll be called back to work eventually, but getting a short phone call to check in from my manager would mean the world to me.

    3. Marion Ravenwood*

      Agreed. I’m currently on furlough for at least the next two weeks, and my work is very much putting the emphasis on keeping in touch whilst we’re off – things like setting us up on our social intranet site and encouraging us to post on there, my colleagues are still inviting me to join our weekly quizzes/team drinks etc, and my boss and I are doing short versions of our Monday catch ups just to check in and make sure everything’s going OK. It does feel very strange but just staying connected is a massive help in terms of not feeling totally cut off and that we are still valuable to the company, even if we’re not actually working right now.

  9. Anon for this*

    So, what if you’re the manager of folks that you had to layoff? I’m assuming they don’t want to hear from you…?

    1. Tiara Wearing Princess*

      (Unless the lay-off was performance related, ) I think it would be great to let the person know that you’re thinking of them and that you’d be happy to provide a reference.

    2. Anon AS WELL!*

      I had the same question because I might be in this boat soon and I feel terrible but if it happens, it’s not about me then it needs to be about the person. I think I’ll reach out but I’ll probably stress about what to say….

    3. Anne of Green Gables*

      I was laid off in 2010, in a ricochet impact of the 2008 recession. My manager did reach out to me, a couple times. Now, we were pretty friendly (I cat-sat for her and stayed in her home when she went on vacation) and she was absolutely a mentor to me. But having her reach out and offer to be a reference and was there anything else she could do was really great–it told me that the layoff really was about the financial situation and not about *me*. So I think that managers can reach out and should–sure, some folks might not like it, but I bet others would be touched.

      I’ll also add that several coworkers, some close and some less close, were fabulous after my layoff. Several people would reach out to me about job openings in the area–I often said that I had a whole village working on getting Anne of Green Gables a job. A few close colleagues went above and beyond–one friend/colleague negotiated a really low registration rate for me to attend a professional conference that had a job seeking component and she had me carpool with her (she was already planning to drive) with the only expectation that I helped with the driving. Obviously professional conferences aren’t going to be a thing for a while, but my point is that all gestures, small and large, were meaningful to me.

  10. Dagny*

    Under normal circumstances, people who are laid off have a myriad of options to help them stay sane and become more employable: volunteer, meet with contacts for coffee and informational interviews, temporary work, side hustles, even an exercise regime. Almost all of that is now nearly impossible, leaving job-seekers without a lot of human contact and opportunities to move forward. In these circumstances, reaching out seems especially appropriate.

  11. Rebecca*

    One of my coworkers did this several times with the person who shared her office, no response. I told her not to worry about it, she was being kind by reaching out, that this is stressful for everyone, but I think it’s reasonable to expect the person who was laid off or furloughed won’t be extra happy about it, especially since I’m hearing that unemployment compensation is severely delayed.

  12. M*

    A group of friends decided to Venmo a friend of ours who was laid off. That way actual cash was never exchanged but they were able to get some money. It wasn’t required but they were thankful before unemployment came through.

    I also think it’s a good idea to Venmo your hair stylist, babysitter or cleaner if you had one. We used a babysitter about twice a month and sent her a check (she doesn’t have Venmo) for two months of paid babysitting. She’s older and this is her income. She was very thankful. She’s wonderful with kids and I’m getting paid so why shouldn’t she? A friend of mine useS the same sitter multiple times a week and even though she and her spouse still have their jobs haven’t paid her. I think it’s pretty yuck not to do that if you are still financially able. Another friend used her once a week and haven’t paid her either. I don’t understand that sentiment if you are financially able to pay people you regularly use.

    This is a stressful time for everyone but I personally think however you can help those who are less of than you the better. It doesn’t have to be monetary either. I have an older neighbor who couldn’t get delivery and was worried about going to the store. My spouse was going so we asked for her list and left them outside. We called her once we left so she knew they were outside.

    1. Roscoe*

      In regards to the babysitter and stylist, this is tough for me. Those people are providing you a service that you aren’t using. Also, just because someone is gainfully employed now, doesn’t mean they will be. I may very well tip my barber more when all this is done and I finally go back, but I don’t feel its necessary to pay them for a haircut I didn’t receive. Because again, who knows where I’ll be financially in a month. Its great that you can do that and choose to, but I don’t think you should look down on those who don’t make that choice.

    2. Senor Montoya*

      M, you don’t know why they’re not paying. Others may be employed but in fact not able to make those payments, or they may be worried about getting laid off and want to save money in case, or have new expenses such as for family members who are now living with them thru the stay-at-home or elderly parents for whom they’re buying groceries to be delivered, etc.

    3. Senor Montoya*

      Sry, hit send too soon.

      Or they are giving that money to someone else in need, such as local artists fund, fund to support students at the university, fund to provide lunches to schoolkids, whatever.

      Life’s too short to assume bad intentions w.o evidence of them.

    4. Rachel in NYC*

      I have a friend who is still paying her nanny- for obvious reasons, she isn’t currently okay with the nanny caring for her child since the nanny has roommates who are interacting daily w/ the outside world- but she and her ex- still have their jobs and need the nanny when this is over.

      To me, it makes a ton of sense.

    5. Bend & Snap*

      I’m still paying my house cleaner even though I’ve asked her not to come. It’s in the budget and I know it helps.

    6. Marion Ravenwood*

      We’re still paying our cleaner but have asked her not to come in for the foreseeable. The way I see it is, we can afford it, and she’s able to keep afloat whilst not putting herself and her family at risk for a job.

    7. Jeffrey Deutsch*

      I think it’s pretty yuck not to do that if you are still financially able.

      I don’t. The way I see it, if we didn’t have a contract (like some daycare centers do, for example) to pay even when work isn’t being performed, I see no reason to continue paying someone who isn’t working for me.

      If you want to make charitable gifts like that, have at it. But spare the rest of us the judgment.

    8. Susie Q*

      “I think it’s pretty yuck not to do that if you are still financially able.”

      You have no idea about someone’s finances. So I wouldn’t make judgments like this.

      1. Anonapots*

        Considering they said IF YOU CAN FINANCIALLY AFFORD TO, that pretty much clears it up. If you can afford to pay the people who depended on you for their livelihood, you have a moral obligation to continue to do it if you have asked them not to come in.

  13. ThisColumnMakesMeGratefulForMyBoss*

    I feel like there are generally 3 types of work relationships. People who are just colleagues – you may exchange small talk and friendly words, but outside of work there’s really no relationship. People who are “work close” – you know more than the basics about each other and may go out for lunch during the work week, but don’t socialize outside of work. And finally people who become real friends – you know a good amount about each other personally and socialize outside of work.

    Maybe I’m in the minority, but I would only be upset to not hear from those in the last category. I would welcome messages from anyone, but wouldn’t take it personally if nobody from the other groups reached out.

    1. RobotWithHumanHair*

      That’s a good point. I don’t have anyone in the last category and really only a couple, if that, in the 2nd category.

      1. allathian*

        Yeah, same here.
        I had several work friends that became real friends when I was in my twenties and worked part time to pay my rent (I’m in the Nordics and education is tuition-free up to and including a Master’s degree, but obviously rent and other costs need paying). Now my main focus is on my family and I have a few good friends that I hang out with when our busy schedules permit. I value my friends and love spending time with them, but I’m introverted enough that I’m not really interested in cultivating a huge network of casual acquaintances.
        I have a few work friends I go to lunch with occasionally, but that’s it.

    2. The Original K.*

      Part of why I was pleasantly surprised to hear from my former colleagues after I was laid off was that they all fell into the first or second category. (It was a global org & team, so being on different continents from 2/3 of them made socializing hard.)

    3. Quinalla*

      I agree I too would only be upset about the last, but I tend to reach out to anyone who is “work close” too for sure and sometimes even colleagues. The conversation looks different of course, but I’ll offer recruiter contact, etc. to anyone and offer to connect on linked-in if we aren’t already. I think as long as the message is appropriate to the level of the relationship, its worth reaching out as most of the time it is appreciated.

  14. DecorativeCacti*

    One thing that creates an issue with reaching out at my workplace is that it’s notorious for people just… vanishing. I get notification every time someone leaves because I track hire/end dates, but it always just says they have “left” regardless of WHY they left, but I’m the only one. There’s no notice for anyone else.

    1. The Original K.*

      My friend works somewhere like this! You don’t know anyone has left until you try to email them and the email bounces. There’s no acknowledgement of any kind that someone is leaving. I find it so strange.

  15. Anon100*

    What if the person laid off was laid off for performance issues? I’m not a direct manager but I reviewed some of this person’s work and the work was quite bad. Management was going to lay this person off a few weeks before non-essential businesses were closed, but due to some personal circumstances management extended the employment a bit longer and laid the person off as part of covid staff reduction (so everyone could save face, I guess).

    I feel kinda weird about reaching out because I don’t want to be a future reference for this person and I did not particularly like them either. I’d rather be quiet because “if you have nothing nice to say, just don’t say it.”

  16. WT*

    My company just went through a HUGE round of layoffs (I made the cut) and it was particularly painful because I was the newest person on the team (~8 months), but I’m literally the only one left and I’m feeling a lot of “survivor’s” guilt. I haven’t really reached out besides accepting linkedin requests because I’m still baffled by why I’m still at work when the people I learned everything I know from are gone. It feels like reaching out would only remind them of how unfair it is. Seeing this post is helpful though, I feel like I needed a sign that I should just do it, especially because I really did love my team and feel gutted that they’re all gone :(

    1. MissDisplaced*

      I’m still baffled by why I’m still at work when the people I learned everything I know from are gone.
      RE: Lower salary most likely.

    2. CupcakeCounter*

      This happened to me during the 2008 recession and the reason I was kept on was that I was the youngest and cheapest. Salaried vs hourly so I could work the extra hours without overtime, lowest vacation accrual, upcoming systems change meant a lot of their more in depth knowledge wasn’t as useful going forward and I showed more aptitude with the new system.
      Reach out, thank them, but do not ask for any help

      1. Jeffrey Deutsch*

        …and I showed more aptitude with the new system.

        That’s a major factor when deciding who stays and who goes.

  17. Kiwi*

    I think that this is heavily dependent upon the culture of your company, department, and your relationship with your coworkers. I’ve never been given the personal number or email for coworkers, even though we work very closely together and exchange pleasantries. So if I reached out to them it would be a questionable use of our Human Resources database on my part…also I’m not sure if anyone really wants to hear from Legal right after being laid off.

  18. MissDisplaced*

    I think the reaching out/not reaching out depends on how closely you worked with them and how well you got along. But by all means if you enjoyed either of those things, don’t feel awkward TO reach out if they got laid off.

    And with that, it can be with whatever you feel most comfortable with: phone, email or even just connecting on LinkedIn if you want a somewhat more impersonal touch. LinkedIn is especially good for this, as that whole platform is precisely for building work acquaintance connections that you may not want to see your friends & family feed on something like Facebook. I’ve stayed in touch with a lot of former coworkers with LinkedIn over the years. So don’t feel weird about it!

  19. Rachel*

    A start-up I worked for got into serious hot water with financing and laid off 2/3s of the staff. My boss (who was also laid off) arranged a few Zoom sessions to commiserate and share job hunting strategies. It was genuinely helpful and led to me landing contract work until I could secure a more permanent position.

  20. Nananana*

    Yes, we had layoffs earlier this year before the lockdown because if the manufacturering recession. We were all very upset and we reached out to the our laid off coworkers. I didn’t have my co-worker’s number but I found him on LinkedIn. I now know he is found a new job and I’m happy for him. He came to drop off some documents at the office and the whole team went downstairs to see him. Of course, that’s not an option now but I’m glad we got to show him we care. Also, he really shouldn’t have been laid off but upper management just decided to do so.

  21. NoCoffeePotUnturned*

    My department has been temporarily laid off with the exception of salaried managers who are working from home (we’re a fine dining restaurant located on a larger corporate campus). We all keep in touch through a group text, and our managers email us once or twice a week to let us know about grants and funds we are eligible to apply for. Knowing we’re going to be able to come back makes it easier. I can’t imagine how tough it is right now for people who have been laid off permanently.

  22. Scott M.*

    I’m friendly with coworkers, but I know I’d feel awkward if any of them reached out to me if I got laid-off. They’re nice an all, but the only reason I interact with them is because I sit near them for 40 hours a week.

  23. DJ*

    I have three supervisors. One of them I heard from once, because I reached out to ask if I could run a certain program for the nonprofit. (I was told no, because I can’t volunteer for my job and they won’t/can’t pay me. Fair.) My main boss sent a “hey I appreciate everything you do” text the day after we closed, when we found out all part-timers were laid off. One (who I work the least hours for) checked in by email a few times, called to make sure I could figure out unemployment, and asked how my parents were (they all know my parents have health issues). I haven’t heard from any of them in weeks. The only communication I get from my organization (past the “you’re not on the schedule until we open again” email) are messages asking us to donate to their fundraising campaigns/figure out a way to donate the money that had been coming out of our paychecks to the campaign. It’s all been very distressing, to be honest. I thought since it was a human services organization that they would see me as a human.

  24. Anonymous Educator*

    One thing I’ve loved seeing is people who weren’t laid off posting on LinkedIn saying “Hey, these folks I worked with were laid off, but they were AMAZING, and please hire them if you’re looking for [fill in the type of role],” and then linking directly to their LinkedIn profiles. I mean, maybe check in with them first to make sure it’s okay to have that be public, but try to help them out to get another job if possible (and if you genuinely liked their work, and they weren’t fired for bad performance).

  25. LuJessMin*

    I thought I had a lot of friends at work, but after I was laid off in 2016, I didn’t hear from any of them. It’s like they’re afraid of catching whatever it was that caused you to be laid off. It’s been almost 4 years and I’m still a little bitter.

  26. Laura*

    My department was furloughed. We have a group text where a couple times a week we touch base, share a pet photo, etc.
    ten years ago, I was fired. I was in over my head and wish they had helped me move to a place where I would have been successful as I had been a star in my previous position. I was 32 and had started the same day as 25 yo new grad. He was typical new grad guy. However he came in one day and I was gone. He messaged me on LinkedIn wishing me the best. I respected that he reached out. We have congratulated each other periodically over the years as we have started new jobs.

  27. Alternative Person*

    I lost a job a few years ago (forced out by a belligerent manager) and losing the friends I had at that job (who I thought were real friends- we hung out, did birthday presents, everything) was honestly worse than losing the job. I’ve moved past it now, but for a long time it really hurt that they promised to keep in touch but never did.

    So yeah, reach out if you can and at the very least if a decent laid off co-worker reaches out, don’t leave them hanging. Throw an african violet if nothing else.

  28. Captain dddd-cccc-ddWdd (ENTP)*

    I’ve found there’s often a sort of ‘taboo’ about laid off co-workers in places I’ve worked, in that they never really get mentioned in the office and history gets quietly re-written as if they were never there…

Comments are closed.