my favorite posts of 2018

Here are my favorite posts of 2018, in no particular order:

1. I delay writing back to people and then never do it
Because so many people struggle with shame over this and don’t need to.

2. I’m hypersensitive to criticism — how do I fix this?
Because we can get wired in weird ways early on, but we can rewire ourselves.

3. My coworker has started faking a British accent
Because this amuses me to no end.

4. Our disruptively cheerful new coworker treats us like toddlers
This one too.

5. The Ask a Manager guide to asking for a raise
Because it’s crazy how many people are afraid to do this.

6. Animals taking over home offices
Because look!

7. My boss wants to give me his kidney — but I don’t want it: the update
Because this is a great example of someone asserting the boundaries they want … and a really happy ending

8. Some things about my mom
For obvious reasons.

Want more? Here are my lists from 20172016201420132012, and 2011.

{ 30 comments… read them below }

      1. Lena Clare*

        Oh there’s an update at the bottom! I don’t know how I missed that. It was slightly less exciting than I would have liked! :) but at least it’s sorted.

      1. RainyDayLibrarian*

        Me too! My husband works from home and deliberately put his office upstairs so he won’t get distracted by our bunny (who has the entire lower level/basement to run around in). So cute, but so distracting.

    1. LQ*

      I really wanted more absurd wild speculation on #3 as to what was really happening. It was a lot of very sensible comments about picking up accents from TV shows. (Though the story about Layla was 100% amazing!)

  1. Detective Amy Santiago*

    Alison – I NEED to know if you got an update for the “Jane has lost her mind” letter. Because that was so absolutely bananacrackers and I’m kind of surprised it didn’t make your list.

      1. Detective Amy Santiago*

        That was definitely my #1 most wanted update for this year.

        OP, if you’re out there… PLEASE update!!!

    1. CoveredInBees*

      Wow! How could I have forgotten about that one. It is just…it really takes your breath away, doesn’t it?

      For everyone else who couldn’t remember the post by name, this was the one where an employee was taking nude selfies:
      at work,
      during work hours,
      posting them to Facebook during work hours,
      all while using a profile indicating where she worked,
      and late invited one of OP’s patients (some sort of medical-related practice) to join one of the Facebook groups where she posts these pictures.

      When told to stop and create an alternate account for nudes taken elsewhere, she claimed this was creating a hostile work environment. She wasn’t fired immediately because she’d be difficult to replace but that was Allison’s advice.

  2. Lavender Menace*

    I’m so glad #1 was one of your favorites, because I also struggle with this and I hadn’t seen that post. There is SO much helpful information on there! I had started to learn some of this on my own (I’m getting to the point in my career where it’s even more important to be reliable, and this actually came up on a performance review) but seeing it reinforced and some other techniques I hadn’t thought of is useful.

    1. alex*

      Agreed; I saved and studied that post (the #1 fave about delaying email responses) and this year have tried to get better about it. The LW’s rundown of the facets of the issue rang so true, and the answer was extremely helpful in both understanding and addressing the problem. Thanks for this post, AAM!

  3. Vicky Austin*

    The toddler one was one of my favorites, too.

    Speaking of toddlers, did we ever get an update from the LW whose co-worker’s little daughter came to the office for an hour every day after school and disrupted the entire office running around, asking people for snacks, and singing Disney songs, and the mother shamed the workers for having unhealthy snacks and telling dirty jokes?

    Then there was the flipside of that letter, from the coworker of two childfree people who were constantly trashing children and using language that insinuated that all parents were as irresponsible and clueless as the mom from the previous letter.

  4. Vicky Austin*

    Oh, and what about the coworker who tickled another coworker, and then the one who was tickled tried to get the tickler fired? Or was that 2017?

  5. I Work on a Hellmouth*

    Man, I really want an update on the British accent. Is it still a thing? Has it been traded in for something trendier? Is it on full time now, or just sometimes? If only sometimes, is there rhyme or reason for when it gets put on? I am very invested in this.

    1. Bowserkitty*

      * When I was about 12, I told her that I figured adults stopped having sex around 26 years old, because after that point they’d be too old and gross. About a decade later, when my then-boyfriend turned 26, she sent him a sympathy card. She is still immensely pleased with herself for this.

      If I could roll in laughter at my desk I would!!!! Your mom is hilarious!!!

  6. Something Clever*

    I ended up reading your tributes to both your mom and your dad and cracked up reading the comments about red hair. I had a coworker many years ago with the reddest hair I’ve ever seen. Like Raggedy Ann. Like a fire engine. People would ask her where she got her hair colored, and she’d reply, “Do you actually think I would choose to color my hair like this???” But it was very cool and memorable.

  7. Jaclyn*

    I would love an update on the British accent one. Particularly because, I’m American and live in the U.S., and my husband was born and raised in the UK. So he as an accent which he is often asked about. Once, someone actually asked him “Is that your real accent?” And later on, in private, we had a good laugh about that, wondering if the person thought he was faking a British accent.

  8. Jaclyn*

    And that actually made me think of something else. Hubby is often asked, “I noticed you have an accent, are you from England/Australia/etc?” I wonder if coworker is ever asked by clients “So, where are you from?” and what her response would be.

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